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Would Ron Swanson Respect You?

On a scale of one to meat tornado.

Posted on
  1. xamtiw / Getty Images
    Yes
    No
    I built some Ikea furniture once
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    "Man imposing his will on nature with tools" is one of Ron's indicators of greatness.

    Via NBC
  2. Crew, high & tight, or buzz cut
    Anything else
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Crew, buzz, and high and tight cuts are the only acceptable hairstyles, according to Ron.

    Via NBC
  3. 6"
    < 6"
    > 6"
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    According to Ron, anything longer than 6" is capri pants, and anything shorter than 6" is European.

    Via Dominik Pabis / Getty Images
  4. Skim
    Anything else
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Skim milk is just water that's lying about being milk. Avoid it at all costs.

    Via NBC
  5. Food
    Sport
    Both
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Fishing is for sport only, as fish meat is "practically a vegetable."

    Via NBC
  6. Two seconds
    Three seconds
    Four seconds
    As long as it takes to establish dominance
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    A firm, three-second handshake is optimal.

    Via NBC
  7. Yeah, tons
    Only during the first 15 minutes of Up
    Only at a funeral and/or the Grand Canyon
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    You also get a pass if you cried when you got hit by a bus or when Lil' Sebastian died.

    Via NBC
  8. Yes
    No, I like to cultivate a manly musk
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Having a personal musk "puts your opponents on notice."

    Via NBC
  9. 1–3
    4–7
    More than 7
    Correct!
    Wrong!

    "One to three is sufficient."

    Via NBC

Would Ron Swanson Respect You?

Not Really

It's not that Ron wouldn't respect you at all or anything, it's just that he would think you were a lot like Tom Haverford.

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A Little Bit

You have a few excellent qualities. Build a canoe and we'll talk.

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Probably

Your accomplishments can only be matched by Ron himself. Ron would consider you "very adequate."

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Absolutely

You are everything that Ron Fucking Swanson would want you to be. You've made Ron proud today. That concludes your praise in this matter.

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