19 Mysteries That Small-Town Midwesterners Will Never, Ever Solve

    Why does everyone insist on calling pop "soda?"

    1. Why do we always say "ope" when we bump into someone?

    2. Why is Meijer the best store in the world?

    3. Why does anyone bother going to Six Flags when Cedar Point exists?

    4. How does Vernors manage to cure any and all illnesses?

    5. Why isn't cornhole an Olympic sport yet?

    6. Why do people from southern states have SO much trouble driving in the snow or rain?

    7. Why bother with the ocean when you have lakes?

    8. Is there anything that DOESN'T taste better with ranch?

    9. Why does everyone insist on calling pop "soda"?

    10. Wait. You're telling me there are places where they actually ~fix~ potholes?

    11. How do students in warmer states get through the year without any snow days?

    12. Is it normal to have snow one day, and then 70-degree weather a few days later?

    13. Is it even a party if you don't have a bonfire going?

    14. Why is your town so awesome, and why does the next town over suck so much?

    15. Why do we apologize so much?

    16. Is there ever going to be a more perfect food than deep dish pizza?

    17. How does anyone ever eat when there are no Coney Islands nearby?

    18. Why do people always call Paczki Day "Fat Tuesday"?

    19. How does anyone live anywhere else?