1.
When that one couple you know is being gross on social media.
2.
When you said you were going to give up gluten but then have a slice of pizza.
3.
When your ex tries to make you jealous but you're honestly like, "Whatever."
4.
When your parents bug you for the hundredth time about when you're going to have kids.
5.
When it's about 4:37 p.m. on a Friday and you're still at work.
6.
When your friend asks you if you want to join a 7 a.m. hot yoga class.
7.
When you just want to call someone "fuck puddle." There's no bad time for this.
8.
When you found out that Pizza Hut was making a pizza with hot dogs in the crust.
9.
When you go in the bathroom after there's been a Chipotle-related disaster.
10.
When someone asks you if you can drive them to the airport.
11.
When you want to say something really super sexy to your significant other during sexy times.
12.
When you want to say something really super unsexy to your significant other during sexy times.
13.
And finally, for when all other words fail you.
