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1. A lint roller for a grossly satisfying gadget that's capable of picking up every speck of gunk plastered onto your furniture. Bliss = being able to remove the plastered pet fur on your couch within seconds, therefore not having to worry that your black leggings look like they're covered in white dust.
2. A squeegee broom to quickly sweep up the water spills, potato chip crumbs, and stray strands that have quickly taken over your tiny apartment. An extendable handle and 100% natural rubber also make this an absolute beast for scooping up pet hair.
3. A jug of CLR (calcium, lime, and rust remover) to finally rid sink faucets and showerheads of dreadful hard water build-up. TL;DR: Photos are worth a thousand words so I suggest taking a gander at the below.
4. Cleaning cups that'll deep clean said coffee machine (#poetry) within minutes. Simply pop this biodegradable cleaner in as you would a cup of caffeine and proceed to marvel at the gunk that's made its way into your daily cup of joe.
5. A vacuum hose attachment in which multiple reviewers (multiple!) swear they pulled out whole socks from their lint traps. Clogged vents = longer drying times = higher utility bills = less money in your bank account to put toward, say, more Seamless takeout.
6. An all-natural tile and tub cleaner that will have you breathing a sigh of relief — literally. You'll no longer be bombarded with that overwhelming icky chemical scent because *this* has light notes of tea tree and eucalyptus but delivers the same results as [insert overwhelmingly smelly cleaner here]! Give your tub a spritz, come back in 15 minutes, and mold, mildew, and rust will slide right off.
7. Affresh dishwasher cleaning tablets because HOW can you get clean, glistening dishes if the dishwasher itself is *gag* covered in grime? Answer: You can't. These babies are here to help. Simply pop one in, put on the rinse cycle, and continue watching your show. Easy peasy.
8. An adjustable duster brush great for air conditioners, fans, and window blinds because news flash, those need to be cleaned on occasion — the amount of dust that can accumulate there is *cough* genuinely disgusting. And don't worry, cleaning said crevices requires but a few minutes of your time and just a flick or two of the wrist.
9. A water-based tile pen that'll transform the chore of grout cleaning into a fun activity reminiscent of filling in the pages of an adult coloring book. Consider mold banished after a few swipes of this nontoxic formula, which releases anti-bacterial agents with each pass.
10. A set of oven liners to save you the heartache (yes, heartache) of burnt roast chicken bits — the kind that will require a minimum of seven scouring pads and so. much. backache. Slide this in to avoid deep cleaning for the next, oh, trillion years.
11. An over-the-drain protector for anyone with a pop-up drain that is a: the bane of their existence and b: constantly getting clogged. Place this on top of your drain to trap gunk *before* it becomes a built-up abyss of gross scum that will take ages of time (and a professional plumber) to clear out.
12. Watermark-removing cloths because if furniture TikTok has taught me anything, it's that water stains on wood truly ruin the value of the most antique pieces — but will we start using coasters? Absolutely not. Let's be realistic. This quickly cleans residue left behind by your morning coffee or mason jar mocktail.
13. A magic carpet spot cleaner over 29,000 devoted reviewers *swear* by for removing stubborn stains. Ever spilled whole glasses of red wine on a white carpet? Opened an old marker and ka-blam, there is now black ink on your couch? This cleaner knows said worries and gets rid of them in a jiffy.
14. A robot vacuum capable of reaching the areas of your home in which you wouldn't dare to venture — we're talking under the couch, baby! Dust bunnies are no match for this nifty gadget, which will clean all your floors whilst you lounge and binge yet another Netflix docu-series.
15. A set of cable clip organizers if the phrases "absolute disaster" and "a mess of tangles" describe your work desk currently. These little doodads feature an adhesive back to keep everything in place, so simply fasten in chargers and rest assured that they will stay put.
16. A bottle of hard water booster powder your cutlery will truly thank you for. This stuff gives 'em back their original shine, plus is wonderful for the trillion ceramic mugs you've accumulated with every TJ Maxx run.
17. A bunch of reusable cable ties that will let you put all "this charging cord is tangled beyond help" situations to rest. These simple Velcro hooks are an easy (but genius) solution that keeps everything from chargers to USB cables in check.
18. A Scrubbing Bubbles toilet stamp to release a foaming gel with every flush, ~relieving~ you of the arduous task of scrubbing your porcelain throne once a week. This does alllllll the hard work on your behalf.
19. A cooktop cleaning kit here to help your oven look as sparkly as the day Home Depot dropped it off at your door. This works to cut grease stains and burnt cookie deposits like a knife, cleaning your cooktop surface more efficiently than any of the multi-surface sprays you've been using until this point.
20. An OxiClean powder for bidding adieu to makeup on white T-shirts, oil stains on your favorite dress, and red wine on your living room accent chair. It's even got the bandwidth to revitalize brickwork, with proof in the incredibly satisfying picture featured below.
21. A non-abrasive Bar Keepers Friend cleansing and polishing powder that will destroy years of icky build-up on all of your porcelain, copper, glass, tile, stainless steel, plastic, and brass. Time to grab your cookware set, folks, because the after photos are about to get GOOD.
22. A grout cleaner that clings to silicone sealants (so the thin area around your shower head, in between your tiles, etc.) and effectively banishes mold and mildew to the pits of heck forever, which is where they rightfully belong. Someone contact Dante and let him know we've got another inferno contender.
23. A garbage disposal brush so you can deep clean *without* having to brace the grossness that is plate dirt and smelly leftovers. So long forever, nasty odors building up in my kitchen sink.
24. A Feed-N-Wax polish and conditioner formulated with a blend of carnauba and beeswax to take your oldest furniture (the kind you've inherited from a grandparent) and make it look brand. spanking. new. It provides a protective coating while removing every single watermark in sight.
25. A power scrubber kit equipped with three different-sized attachments, each one perfect for the corners, floor, and door of your shower. This takes off years of accumulated build-up in just mere minutes, doing a better job than you would have been able to do by hand. In the words of Daft Punk, this is just better, faster, and stronger.
26. A hard water stain-remover because I'm ready to say so long and farewell to the days of staring at my gross shower head that still looks awful despite hours (upon hours) of scrubbing. This quick-working formula is great for toilets, tiles, shower doors, and really anything else that's been affected by hard water!
27. A microwave steam cleaner to finally (and I mean finally) rid your microwave of the caked-on dinner that's been there since about, oh, last year. Simply fill this handy device with vinegar, let 'er run for five to seven minutes, wipe, and done.
28. And a faux wood electrical cord box that'll hide unsightly wires that cause heartache by just looking at them. The tangles! The never-ending tangles! They're more than I can personally handle, so I will be hiding them with this box: It's the more efficient tech equivalent of "the chair."*
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