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1. A cozy costume you might not want to order, despite its cuteness. Why? It'll make you feel a little batty.
2. A PB&J set that, unfortunately, does not come with the crusts cut off. It also doesn't come with a baseball bat.
3. An inflatable T. rex costume you'll want to wear to the park. Jurassic Park.
4. A glow-in-the-dark catsuit that's pretty damn simple. If you're looking for a bare-bones ensemble, this is it.
5. A T-shirt, cape, and headband combo for the Gal who needs a simple, inexpensive costume for a Halloween bash.
6. Butterfly wings obsessed with Mariah Carey, and I have no idea why. They even watch her new reality show.
7. A three-piece costume that'll make your Hauntober more ~bewitching~ than ever before.
8. A Red Riding Hood costume for anyone who hates Duran Duran ("Hungry Like the Wolf" brings back bad memories).
9. A fringed dress you can pair with pearls, a headband, and a cigarette holder for the ultimate flapper ensemble.
10. A mermaid costume trying to be part of your world. It's just really sick of being under the sea.
11. A collared dress you can wear any day of the week, except for hump days. Wednesdays suck, am I right?
12. And of course, a black Morticia Addams gown that'll have your significant other drooling all over you like Gomez.
13. A vampiress gown guaranteed to ~revamp~ your wardrobe. This'll make a fangtastic addition to your closet.
14. A red wedding dress for anyone who relates to Lydia Deetz on a personal level. You, too, are strange and unusual.
15. A sailor-inspired costume obsessed with Styx. It constantly requests to sing "Come Sail Away" at karaoke nights.
16. A Mona Lisa costume not intended for the faint of heart. You'll have to shave off your eyebrows for authenticity.
17. A ragdoll costume known to have a huge attitude problem. It's always a total nightmare, especially before Christmas.
18. A shark onesie destined to make waves. Humming the Jaws theme song while wearing this is highly recommended.
19. A simple Alice costume perfect for tea parties, jumping down rabbit holes, fighting evil queens, etc.
20. A pirate costume that'll have you feeling like you're in the Caribbean. (READ: on vacation and not at work.)
21. A Gingy costume complete with gumdrop buttons. No one will be able to get ogre how amazing you look.
22. A Helga costume for anyone who has ever been irrevocably in love before. With a man named Arnold, to be specific.
23. A Snow White costume that comes with this warning in the label: DO NOT TAKE APPLES FROM STRANGERS.
24. A Totoro onesie so cozy, you'll want to wear it throughout all the cold months. (IMPORTANT: not just on Halloween.)
25. A Power Rangers costume for the person who wanted nothing more than to be Kimberly in their youth.
26. A Rey costume you certainly won't have to ~force~ any Star Wars devotee to wear.
27. A Greek goddess ensemble guaranteed to have you feeling hotter than Hades. #confident
28. A unicorn onesie that'll make you Voldemort's prime target, other than Harry Potter himself. You've been warned.
Me, realizing that Halloween is .5 seconds away and I have yet to purchase a costume:
