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1. A large bottle of Torani brown sugar cinnamon syrup reviewers swear makes a dupe of the overpriced bevvies you'd purchase from that *ahem* not-to-be-named coffee chain. The logo is dark green. There's a mermaid.
2. A Takeya cold brew maker so you can drink your favorite caffeinated beverage whenever you please without the $5+ charge (NYC coffee = so damn expensive). This is cleverly designed with an airtight lid and stainless-steel filter to keep coffee fresh for up to two weeks.
3. A set of six drinking glasses to make your iced caffeine feel like a luxury with every sip. Starting your morning with the below in hand = a surefire way to begin the day properly.
4. A buttery cinnamon roll seasoning from Flavor God, which can make even the most watered-down java taste divine. Simply top with a splash of the below and voila, perfect coffee every time.
5. A Chamberlain Coffee ~sleepy sloth~ blend, a decaf option for folks who want a hot cup but don't want to risk missing their prompt 11:30 p.m. bedtime. This contains delicious notes of chocolate and fruit.
6. An electric grinder if you're sick of [insert affordable instant brand here] and are trying to broaden their caffeine horizons. This affordable gadget chews up and spits out whole beans into coarse, medium, or fine grinds. Beans! Beans! They make you very happy if allocated for the perfect cup of coffee.
7. A durable tumbler bottle that I own and have dubbed my personal "emotional support tumbler." Not sure what to say in that Zoom meeting? Take a sip of water and/or iced coffee. Hydrating and caffeinating your awkwardness will have never gone hand-in-hand so fluidly.
8. A Torani pumpkin pie sauce because PSL season is fantastic, but expensive (and requires leaving the house). Top off your morning cup of caffeine with this delicious treat...and not just for one season, but all year long. I said what I said.
9. A bag of organic Death Wish coffee if you have a meeting scheduled for 8 a.m., which is sort of a problem due to the fact that you... usually wake up at 8 a.m. If anything can turn you into a morning person, it'll be this — a very, very strong cup of caffeine.
10. An Oxo pour-over coffee maker lauded by reviewers for making the "perfect cup of coffee every time". This foolproof gadget is equipped with a dipper, an auto-drip water tank with printed measurements, and a lid to keep the water hot.
11. A HyperChiller so you can live your best iced coffee life without having to leave the house. This takes a cup of fresh hot coffee and chills it by 130 degrees in less than 60 seconds, all without diluting the flavor. Watered down iced coffee = a pet peeve you'll never have to deal with again.
12. A tiny milk frother that makes it easy to whip up your very own, typically very expensive PSL at home — and quickly. This stainless-steel whisk truly has so many darn uses: cappuccinos, lattes, hot chocolate, matcha, milkshakes, and more.
13. A Bodum pour-over coffee maker here to turn you into a complete caffeine snob. This heat-resistant borosilicate glass carafe is designed with a permanent filter that makes a smooth serving of joe, is dishwasher safe, and can make up to 8 cups at a time.
14. Bottle Bright cleaning tablets that quickly remove all that funky, gross, probably-starting-to-smell build-up in your coffee pot or favorite reusable coffee mug. These are biodegradable, chlorine-free, and require absolutely NO effort or scrubbing, but will make your caffeine holders look as if they've just been brought home from the store.
15. A reusable coffee filter to replace all those paper filters that are a) expensive, b) consistently run out when one needs them most, and c) are unnecessarily wasteful. Give yourself the gift of both saving money *and* helping planet Earth one less piece of trash at a time.
16. A Stanley pour-over coffee maker that ensures a delicious cup of java, even if you're *shudders* camping in the middle of nowhere. This durable hunk of stainless steel can take a lot of wear and tea, plus the stainless steel filter enhances flavor and won't need to be constantly replaced — unlike the wasteful paper versions you've used in the past.
17. A manual JavaPresse grinder designed with an adjustable grind selector so you can choose from 18 different coarseness levels *and* make sure that all your beans are being properly ground — with many caffeine machines, a ton of product gets wasted. But not with this!
18. Keurig cleaning cups to deep clean your coffee machine (#poetry) within minutes. Simply pop this biodegradable cleaner in as you would a cup of caffeine, and proceed to marvel at the gunk that's made its way into your daily cup of joe.
19. An Atlas Coffee Club subscription that delivers fresh beans ::immediately thinks of Even Stevens:: to your doorstep. Each box curates a new coffee type with personalized roasts and grinds, a postcard from a new country each month, plus tasting notes and tips for each batch. If you weren't already a coffee snob...
20. A Mr. Coffee mug warmer perfect for slow drinkers who prefer their caffeine hot, hot, and hot — even if they poured it hours ago.
21. A Javy cold brew concentrate that over 18,000 reviewers cannot stop raving about. Simply mix 1 or 2 teaspoons with water or milk for instant (and delicious) coffee.
22. Reusable silicone straws for guzzling down iced coffee with gusto. The secret perk of this particular set? Cleanliness! Snap closures mean you can open the straws in half to ensure they're dry and gunk-free! Just give 'em a good wipe down. No more "cleaning" brushes required.
23. A dishwasher-safe milk pitcher that can both froth and steam milk, as well as measure liquids. Looking to become a barista in your own abode? Here's the first step toward mastering the art.
24. Long-handle spoons to stir any beverage to *chef's kiss* absolute perfection. Your iced coffee will taste immaculate. That artisanal cocktail in which you've put three too many scoops of sugar is going to be A-OK. Just keep stirring and listen to the ASMR sounds of metal hitting glass. I feel serene already.
25. A BlenderBottle shaker bottle designed with a leak-proof seal, a flip cap snap, a carrying loop, and a stainless-steel wire whisk for whipping up protein shakes in a pinch. One reviewer even combines instant coffee and water for a morning caffeine boost!
26. Reusable K Cups that are about to save you so much cold hard cash. Not only are these practical puppies *so* much better at reducing waste, but they're also compatible with all Keurig machines and guarantee good joe, every time.
27. An ice cube tray for making nugget-shaped cubes that are the secret sauce behind [insert fast food chain here] cold drinks. No cold brew is complete without any of the frozen water below.
28. A W&P Porter ceramic mug as gorgeous as it is useful (I mean, this screams Pinterest board). This is reusable, has a protective silicone sleeve, and comes with a secure lid press that makes this the perfect companion for daily morning strolls.
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