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1. A container of extra absorbent dual-sided wipes because the place doling out "clean" laundry should...probably be clean itself. These are capable of removing a ton of built-up detergent scum and various gunk, aka you'll be able to keep your expensive washing machine in tip-top shape by regularly giving rubber seals, detergent pockets, and drums a monthly swipe.
2. An Aunt Fannie's carpet refresher available in lemon and lavender scents, both of which are subtle enough to *not* cause nose wrinkling... but strong enough to neutralize odors of all varieties (*cough* I'm looking at your pet).
3. A pumice cleaning stone capable of removing calcium, lime, and hard water stains on everything from your toilet bowl to your outdoor barbecue. The stone itself is also surprisingly gentle and won't scratch the surface of, say, your porcelain throne.
4. A Mrs. Meyer's multi-surface scrub capable of getting rid of grime with little elbow grease required. From scorched pans and crusty faucets to bathtubs in need of serious TLC, say hello to your new favorite cleaning product.
5. A tub of screen wipes if Netflix marathons have ever been compromised by the thick layers of dust coating your TV. These are quick, easy to use, don't leave behind streaks, won't ruin expensive electronics, and reviewers swear they have an anti-static property to prevent accumulated gunk.
6. A cleaning brush kit to draw out the dust hidden in plain sight...right under your nose. Literally. A few passes with these compact, handheld brushes and whoosh! Perhaps now you won't be inhaling allergy mites with every breath you take.
7. A lint remover that's capable of picking up every speck of dust, dirt, and pet hair plastered onto your furniture. This means that you can get dressed, sit on your couch to drink your morning coffee, and leave the house with peace of mind knowing your outfit isn't covered with a layer of fur.
8. A pack of microfiber cloths for a lint- and streak-free finish on glassware, windows, and yes, that includes light fixtures that have been permanently covered in a layer of dulling grime. The best part is you don't even need a cleaning solution! A bit of water combined with one of these cloths is all you'll need.
9. An OXO duster purposely designed with a loonnnnnngg microfiber cloth and extender, which means the dust bunnies living rent-free under your sofa have just met their maker. One reviewer pulled an actual lip gloss tube (!!!!) from under their oven.
10. A Puracy multi-purpose cleaner formulated with plant-based ingredients ideal for walls, coffee tables, hardwood floors, furniture, and everything in between. Choose between lemongrass or green tea and lime scents — regardless of your choice, rest assured your living room won't be overwhelmed with the smell of chemicals.
11. A robot vacuum capable of reaching the areas of your home in which you wouldn't dare to venture — we're talking under the couch, baby! Dust bunnies are no match for this nifty gadget, which will clean all your floors whilst you lounge and binge yet another Netflix docu-series.
12. A wood polish lauded by one reviewer as the ~best money they've ever spent~. Trying your hand at furniture restoration has never been so easy: a few drops of this formula is powerful enough to cover even the most unsightly scratches.
13. A hard water stain-remover so that your faucets and glass doors can finally look squeaky clean. So long, days of staring at my gross shower head that still looks awful despite hours (upon hours) of scrubbing.
14. A FlexiSnake millipede that's not meant for the faint of heart. Use this to easily de-clog every drain in your home, but prepare for the horror you'll experience as you dig up about one million pounds of hair and built-up gunk.
15. An Iron Out spray gel for anyone whose cleaning products have been a little ~rusty~ lately. This promises to get rid of hard water rust build-up like it's no one's business.
16. An adjustable duster brush great for air conditioners, fans, and window blinds because news flash, those need to be cleaned on occasion — the amount of dust that can accumulate there is *cough* genuinely disgusting. And don't worry, cleaning said crevices requires but a few minutes of your time and just a flick or two of the wrist.
17. A magic carpet spot cleaner over 29,000 devoted reviewers *swear* by for removing stubborn stains. Ever spilled whole glasses of red wine on a white carpet? Opened an old marker and ka-blam, there is now black ink on your couch? This cleaner knows said worries and gets rid of them in a jiffy.
18. A tub of The Pink Stuff, an all-purpose paste that's capable of tackling your most pesky cleaning problems. Caked-on grease stuck to kitchen cabinets and red vino stains on white carpeting will all but vanish, with no elbow grease required (an ideal cleaning situation).
19. A jug of CLR (calcium, lime, and rust remover) to finally rid sink faucets and showerheads of dreadful hard water build-up. TL;DR: Photos are worth a thousand words so I suggest taking a gander at the below.
20. An OxiClean powder for bidding adieu to makeup on white T-shirts, oil stains on your favorite dress, and red wine on your living room accent chair. It's even got the bandwidth to revitalize brickwork, with proof in the incredibly satisfying picture featured below.
21. A box of Affresh dishwasher cleaning tablets because HOW can you get clean, glistening dishes if the dishwasher itself is *gag* covered in grime? Answer: You can't. These babies are here to help. Simply pop one in, put on the rinse cycle, and continue watching your show. Easy peasy.
22. A squeegee broom to quickly sweep up the water spills, potato chip crumbs, and stray strands that have quickly taken over your tiny apartment. An extendable handle and 100% natural rubber also make this an absolute beast for scooping up pet hair.
23. An all-natural tile and tub cleaner that will have you breathing a sigh of relief — literally. You'll no longer be bombarded with that overwhelming icky chemical scent because *this* has light notes of tea tree and eucalyptus but delivers the same results as [insert overwhelmingly smelly cleaner here]! Give your tub a spritz, come back in 15 minutes, and mold, mildew, and rust will slide right off.
24. A Rubbermaid power scrubber that quickly ~scrubs~ away the stubborn soap scum you've been disgusted by for ages, but quietly ignored until now. This will have every corner of your bathroom looking as if went through a truly deep clean (even if the effort you put in was minimal).
25. A power scrubber kit equipped with three different-sized attachments, each one perfect for the corners, floor, and door of your shower. This takes off years of accumulated build-up in just mere minutes, doing a better job than you would have been able to do by hand. In the words of Daft Punk, this is just better, faster, and stronger.
26. A Glisten foaming cleaner to neutralize the funky odors coming from your garbage disposal (*yuck*). This lemon-scented stuff requires absolutely no effort and two simples steps: turn on hot water, add the cleanser.
27. A stainless-steel cleaner that will rid your large appliances (I'm looking at you, refrigerator) of all unsightly fingerprints and smudges. This blend of plant-based ingredients will even prevent future smudges from forming and (HALLELUJAH) doesn't leave any streaks behind.
28. A set of cleaning sponges that may have been invented by an actual magician, as these bad boys are absolute pros at sloughing away soap scum and built-up residue. If you're terrified of bathing in your own tub due to unidentified stains, it's time you invested in a Magic Eraser.
29. A grout cleaner that clings to silicone sealants (so the thin area around your shower head, in between your tiles, etc.) and effectively banishes mold and mildew to the pits of heck forever, which is where they rightfully belong. Someone contact Dante and let him know we've got another inferno contender.
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