1.When you were born you practically looked like a Beatle.
2.And all of your baby pictures have a vaguely Muppet-esque quality to them.
3.You endured YEARS of teasing for having hairy arms and legs. It was hurtful.
4.And you had to beg your mom or dad to let you start shaving as soon as the other girls started. It was for your social self-preservation.
5.Your eyebrows have always been like a Shetland pony – wild, free, and extremely fuzzy.
6.And if you're into getting them done, they can look AMAZING because there's so much hair to work with.
7.But it will take less than 12 hours for you to start seeing leeeeetle brow hairs pop up, ruining your nice lines.
8.You also can't go into a brow waxing or threading place without people assuming you're there for your mustache.
9.Which has been a source of anguish for you for as long as you can remember, because your 'stache is dark and full of terrors.
10.Going in to get your lower bits waxed is always an adventure because your technician can never quite hide his or her surprise at how much you've got going on there.
11.Real talk: they've also flipped you over and waxed your butthole without you asking. Don't lie. It's happened.
12.You often catch yourself idly petting your own arm hair.
13.Come summer, you have seriously considered shaving your toes.
14.And you always use an Instagram filter that washes out your knuckle hair when you're showing off a manicure.
15.You lose more hair in the shower than most people have on their heads.
16.But your hair never appears to thin out, despite losing approximately one Barbie wig's worth of hair every time you wash.
17.And basically having thick, luxurious, shampoo-commercial hair is the bonus you get for being one of the Hair Goddess' chosen women. That's something to celebrate!
