We Need To Talk About “Burbujas De Amor,” A Song About Fish Sex

You say you want to make love bubbles... where, exactly?

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Guys. We need to talk about "Burbujas de Amor."

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Juan Luis Guerra y 4-40 / Via youtube.com

You remember this song, right?

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It's off Juan Luis Guerra and 4-40's 1991 album, Bachata Rosa, and tells the story of a man so in love with a woman that he wants to turn into a fish.

Ok, let's jump right into the lyrics. Here we go:

Alex Alvarez / Via BuzzFeed.com

The translation: I have a heart that's been stripped of hope and reason. I have a heart that wakes up wherever.

The meaning: This guy is suffering. He's lost all hope of finding someone to really love, but will get so nasty you guys with literally whomever. Who even cares.

Ok, typical love stuff. Let's continue:

Alex Alvarez / Via BuzzFeed.com

The translation: And this heart undresses impatiently upon hearing your voice. Poor heart, who can't maintain its sanity.

The meaning: He's got a heart-on.

It can't get any worse, right? And yet...

Alex Alvarez / Via BuzzFeed.com

The translation: Pull an all-nighter... WET. INSIDE. YOU.

The meaning: I mean. That's what grown folks do when they're pressing fish noses against fish bowls. Also: WHAT.

Alex Alvarez / Via BuzzFeed.com

The translation: A fish.

The meaning: Like, in case you'd forgotten. Wet in you. As a fish.

A FISH. WET FISH INSIDE YOU. PRESSING ALL UP AGAINST YOUR FISH BOWL. FISH.

Wait, did you get that?

Let me repeat it for you.

Ok, and did you notice...

Weight Watchers / Via giphy.com

... that this fish is, like. A super fish that can press its nose (which, I am no fish doctor, but I think that's a rare feature for a fish to possess) against a fish bowl and then IMMEDIATELY, like, teleport into a woman's body? That is a magical horny fish. The kind your mom warned you about.

And I mean, it goes on from there.

Being all romantic and fish-themed and whatnot. Juan Luis Guerra sings (beautifully, too) about creating silhouettes under the moonlight and wanting to be with his lady forever, face to face, gill to gill.

Because.