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24 Things Your Parents Did That Guaranteed You Never Got A Date

Mom and dad should have known better.

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1. Your parents were obviously the ones who insisted you use a rolling bookbag:

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Which you could fill with all the numbers you didn't get!

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14. They said boys would think your unibrow was cute:

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Some of us just learned to rock it with pride.

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16. They suggested you get transition lenses, because it's like a free pair of sunglasses:

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You tragically realized how wrong this was about four years too late.

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24. And if by some miracle somebody was digging your style, your parents found a way to scare the living hell out of them:

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"BACK AT HOME BEFORE 6 P.M. TODAY, YOUNG MAN, AND CALL ME EVERY HALF HOUR SO I KNOW SHE'S SAFE."