Blake Shelton’s Great Phrase For A Bad Day

Today’s Twiter Buzz: it’s raining titties for Blake today.

This just isn't my day... It could be raining titties and I'd get hit in the head with a dick...

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) April 18, 2012

Source: @blakeshelton

I have been many people ..but there is one person i am and will always be ....... I AM THE KNIGHTRIDER!

— David Hasselhoff (@DavidHasselhoff) April 20, 2012

Source: @DavidHasselhoff

I dropped my 18 pound ego, only 2 more to go! @kathygriffin: telling @nicolerichie 2 take off those last 20 lbs instagr.am/p/JnJGETtDDV/

— Nicole Richie (@nicolerichie) April 19, 2012

Source: @nicolerichie

Remember Sloth from "Goonies"? He got that way from marijuana. #420NO

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

Hey, what was that noise? 4/20 just killed 30 people you care about. #MarijuanaFuneral

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

No coincidence that 4/20 Marijuana Christmas is on Hitler's birthday. Smoking "pot" tells the world "Hitler is my main homie." #420NO

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

Before Hitler invented marijuana, heart disease & horse accidents were the leading killers in Germany.

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

I disagree with Mitt Romney that the best way to celebrate Hitler's birthday is by smoking marijuana out of a policeman's butt. #420NO

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

My "friend" Tim tried to live-tweet smoking a marijuana. He did 1 tweet before all his guts fell out of his bottom-hole. He had 4 kids. #RIP

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 20, 2012

Source: @robdelaney

I love that @kimkardashian still crawls in bed with me...she's still my little girl! #favoritething twitter.com/KrisJenner/sta…

— Kris Jenner (@KrisJenner) April 20, 2012

Source: @KrisJenner

I am grasshopper!RT @ochocinco: Anybody up?

— Wes Welker (@WesWelker) April 20, 2012

Source: @WesWelker

4/20-I dedicate "till I die" to all those muhfuckas who live their life to the fullest! ELEVaTE MenTally!

— Chris Brown(@chrisbrown) April 20, 2012

Source: @chrisbrown

bloke on set"are you a location assistant? " I reply "no,I'm a tap dancer with the russian ballet" "oh" he says" you don't sound Russian"

— Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) April 20, 2012

Source: @russellcrowe

"@KhloeKardashian: I feel like I'm dreaming :) please never wake me up!" happy 4/20 pothead!

— Robert Kardashian (@RobKardashian) April 20, 2012

Source: @RobKardashian

Happy 4/20!!! Happy Every Stoners Birthday!

— Wiz Khalifa (@RealWizKhalifa) April 20, 2012

Source: @RealWizKhalifa

Im Gonna Be Tweetin Pictures Of Weed All Day. Don't Mind Me :-)

— Wiz Khalifa (@RealWizKhalifa) April 20, 2012

Source: @RealWizKhalifa

Special Daaaaaaaay!

— Wiz Khalifa (@RealWizKhalifa) April 20, 2012

Source: @RealWizKhalifa

Just because it's 4/20 doesn't mean "those kind of jokes". Pot is a gateway drug. Also no Hitler jokes. Nazism is a gateway political party.

— Colin Quinn (@iamcolinquinn) April 18, 2012

Source: @iamcolinquinn

Ordering an autoharp online....

— Jewel (@jeweljk) April 20, 2012

Source: @jeweljk

Once when I was little I was trying to fall asleep so I imagined Chris Farley lying on me til I passed out and I still feel guilty about it

— Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) April 20, 2012

Source: @lenadunham

My goal, generally, is to relax.

— sara gilbert (@THEsaragilbert) April 20, 2012

Source: @THEsaragilbert

UH @Nicolerichie just told me she wants to be the cat on Cee Lo's lap

— Joel Madden (@JoelMadden) April 20, 2012

Source: @JoelMadden

IT'S 240 DAY mannnnn I'm freakin out

— benji madden (@benjaminmadden) April 20, 2012

Source: @benjaminmadden

Jizz on you @KhloeKardashian

— Robert Kardashian (@RobKardashian) April 20, 2012

Source: @RobKardashian

Jizz on you @RobKardashian

— KhloéKardashianOdom (@KhloeKardashian) April 20, 2012

Source: @KhloeKardashian

They say to live every day like it's your last. I kinda do that by crying every morning.

— Chris D'Elia (@chrisdelia) April 20, 2012

Source: @chrisdelia

i wish i could order delivery for a slim jim

— allison harvard (@alliharvard) April 20, 2012

Source: @alliharvard

Yay I am!!! twitter.com/KELLYROWLAND/s…

— KELENDRIA ROWLAND (@KELLYROWLAND) April 20, 2012

Source: @KELLYROWLAND

Why are all thease hot looking woman replying to my tweets do they want me to hit on them or something

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) April 19, 2012

Source: @JoseCanseco

Girls don't show me your pics and fish for compliments like angelica did and say I am hitting on you .

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) April 20, 2012

Source: @JoseCanseco

4/20....4/20.....4/20...

— LA LA(@lala) April 20, 2012

Source: @lala

I decided to buy myself a sensible car for once! ....say.ly/yWv37JP

— Simon Cowell (@SimonCowell) April 20, 2012

Source: @SimonCowell

Wow. You guys really liked that episode.Agreed, not one for newbies. Good news: our ratings will STILL be a random number between 0 and 3!

— Dan Harmon (@danharmon) April 20, 2012

Source: @danharmon

Just heard on the news someone got drunk at Sea World and tried stealing a penguin...that's funny, I don't remember being at Sea World.

— Chris Colfer (@chriscolfer) April 20, 2012

Source: @chriscolfer

Your a Great man @Deesnider I couldn't be prouder.I will be by your side till the end of times.

— Dee Snider (@deesnider) April 20, 2012

Source: @deesnider

After years of reflection and careful consideration, I've finally gotten a tattoo.Like it? twitter.com/GarretDillahun…

— Garret Dillahunt (@GarretDillahunt) April 20, 2012

Source: @GarretDillahunt

My kids are out of school today and I'm having a difficult time explaining why this is a holiday.

— Ethan Suplee (@EthanSuplee) April 20, 2012

Source: @EthanSuplee

I forgot how much I loved following people. Blocking is no longer my favorite thing to do on twitter.

— Spencer Pratt(@spencerpratt) April 20, 2012

Source: @spencerpratt

A girl just used air quotes around "ironic" Does that mean she was being ironically ironic or not at all ironic#helpmealanismorissette

— Jason Jones (@jonesinforjason) April 20, 2012

Source: @jonesinforjason

4/20 Never Remember

— Jeffrey Ross (@realjeffreyross) April 20, 2012

Source: @realjeffreyross