How about: “What are you doing here?” when someone sees me AT WORK, DOING MY JOB (male dom field). This gets asked of me at least once a week. Sometimes it’s “How the hell did you end up here?”, “What do you think that you are doing?”, “Wouldn’t you rather be in the office?”, “Why are they making you do this?”, or “Doesn’t your husband make enough money?” I wish that I could just work without having to constantly defend my presence. “Why don’t you just let the men handle that?”, followed immediately by “Why are you offended by that? I was just worried about your safety.” Again, while I am at work, doing the damn job that I am being paid for. If that original question were ever said to any man, don’t tell me that it wouldn’t be automatically perceived as an insult? “Why don’t you bring us some cookies tomorrow?”… “What do you mean, you don’t bake cookies? Aren’t you married?” The number one: “Why didn’t you take your spouses name?” Sometimes I ask this of men, just to even things out, but it is usually taken with confusion, laughter, or even anger as if I was trying to insult their masculinity. To all of the people saying that men must get asked these things too, understand that the point is that not only are women asked these things annoyingly often, but we are forced to answer them as if they are genuine questions, and we are not allowed to be insulted. (No, no one is pointing a gun to my head, but I may be ostracized, beaten up, or have my my career chances ruined). Consider this: my husband works in a female dominated field. He concurs that, although he definitely feels the effects of the patriarchy, he also recognizes that he does not have it anywhere near as bad. When people ask him why he chose his field, it is always with respect and not indignance - for instance, he is constantly told “I’m so glad to see a man here!” and “We need more men in [his field]”, and I have never ONCE been told that we need more women in my field. No one has ever been happy to see me show up to work in their crew - most people either just grumble, throw me shade, or pretend like I’m not there (give me no work assignments). To be clear, these are people that have never met me before. The only thing that they know about me is my name and gender. For him, he has to fight off promotions and is constantly embarrassed by the obvious preferential treatment that he receives, whereas I have to fight for every bone, and I still get the “well, we’ll see” treatment.