18 Weird Things Everyone Does In Private But Wouldn’t Do Publicly

What? I’m just having an imaginary argument out loud. Deal with it.

1. 1. Sing really extravagantly/sing opera style REALLY LOUD.

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Pavarotti would be proud, he really would.

2. 2. Walk around naked.

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Definitely not OK to do outside the house, in fact you’ll probably get arrested.

3. 3. Talk to yourself.

4. 4. Play weird games like taping up your face.

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If you haven’t done this, you haven’t lived.

5. 5. Dance like no one is watching.

7. 6. Inexplicable jumping.

It can’t be explained.

9. 7. Making weird faces to yourself.

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Sometimes the urge is just too great.

10. 8. Have imaginary arguments out loud.

You are the king of excellent comebacks… four days later.

11. 9. Run up stairs on all fours.

Seriously, imagine doing that in a shop.

12. 10. Spying on people.

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NEVER spy on people in a place you could get caught.

14. 11. Squeezing spots.

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Whether yours or someone else’s, people just don’t like it.

15. 12. Scoffing food.

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The only exception to the rule is possibly in the cinema.

16. 13. Trying to move stuff with your mind.

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Strictly keep this behind closed doors (and keep practising, it’ll happen…)

17. 14. Bad habits.

Keep that sh*t in check.

18. 15. Climbing on furniture.

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Sure, feel free to arrange yourself on furniture at home however you want, just don’t be doing it in public seating areas.

19. 16. Farting really obviously…

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And if you do, pretend it wasn’t you anyway.

20. 17. *MEN ONLY* Windmilling/Helicopter Penis

Sure it’s fun when you’re just out the shower but do it in public and people will freak out.

21. 18. Making weird noises.

These have a habit of sneaking out when in a public place.

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