Boris Johnson Wrote A Bloody Awful Poem

Warning: this post includes the full poem.

London mayor Boris Johnson has written a poem. He read it out at the launch party of a book by his friend, journalist Rachel Kelly. It is awful.

Dan Kitwood / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson / Via standard.co.uk

The poem was published by the Evening Standard.

The poem goes on for quite some time.

Oli Scarff / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson

(Boris was in the Bullingdon Club with Rachel Kelly's husband, a banker called Sebastian.)

It includes a segment about London transport.

Oli Scarff / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson

And a bit where he called Ed Miliband a mysterious four-letter word that rhymes with "Blunt".

Michael Steele / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson

Lots of political jokes.

Matt Cardy / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson

Eventually it finishes.

Matt Cardy / Getty Images | Tom Phillips/BuzzFeed/Boris Johnson

Never do this again, Boris.