2. And your very cheap food.
Like those 72 Weetabix that only cost £4.18. That’s less than 6p per Weetabix.
3. Thank you for dressing your staff so beautifully.
6. You haven’t quite grasped the concept of a discount.
8. But that’s OK. You’re forgiven because you sell “Angry Birds” Jenga.
10. And something called a “pipe installation kit”.
11. In fact, Lidl, you sell pretty much everything. We’d always come to you for fake birds.
14. If we started a band, we’d buy our guitars from you.
17. And this woman likes you so much that she made a dress out of your carrier bags.
18. Maybe it’s because your recruitment posters centre around visual food-based puns.
19. Or because you held a cheeky Burns Night celebration in January.
21. You make it a quite difficult to get out of your stores.
But don’t worry, Lidl. We would never leave you.