Aaron Sorkin ain't care.

If they had cut off Christian Bale, he would have gone ballistic, amirite?

If they're going to cut anything short, it should be the lame-joke-riddled introductions from overpaid celebrities. (Although Melissa Leo needed Keyboard Cat for sure!)

I hate when they play off the technical awards winners, they work just as hard, if not harder, than the supposed stars.

I think in keeping with this year's Oscar attempts to appeal to younger viewers, they should have had Keyboard Cat play them off….

I would like to thank Scott Lamb for this post. His tireless efforts to Buzz are a credit to the entire history AND of course: all this would not be possible without the great support of those people here at Buzzfeed, the advertisers, those that are Going Viral right now … And on a personal note, I would like to thank my boyfriends; my girlfriends too; my two (more or less) children that I “may” have …. My parents, who are now on speaking terms with me (sorry about the fire mom, it was the drugs)… I can't forget to thank my cat , Mr. Wiggles, for his tireless attempts to fill the litter box …. Gee , f*ck this is so cool… What, what? Oh god ! I'm just so happy I, I didn't mean too … {KEY up Music, Raise orchestral volume, escort Joey stage left …..}

Damn straight nobody plays off Colin Firth.