#12 - you know that’s just another way to say “Just Married,” right? He’s not actually celebrating serving a the kind of life sentence you’re thinking of.

If you’ve ever listened to her music, you’d know she’s wayyy more than just Beyonce’s sister. She might even have more vocal talent than Beyonce (or at the very least it’s competitive!)

Have you ever watched America’s Next Top Model? Tyra cannot STOP calling every girl on that show “fierce”

Woof. Are you joking or does someone need to explain some things to you?

I like how that girdle fitter is pointing to #7’s tiny tummy like “tsk tsk, you fat heifer…”

that was my EXACT reaction. Napski!

Didn’t Obama say in his address this morning that members of Congress will be required to get their healthcare from this pool as well?

Then I think you’re the person they were talking to when they said, “But if you can actually justify spending $48 on a lipstick, then you’re probably the sort of girl who can’t possibly settle for anything less.”

This is even better than the Sorkinisms supercut that someone made yesterday (which was pretty hard to beat)

Had to do a quick check to make sure none of these chucklefucks were members of my extended family. (dodged that bullet, for now)

Is this clown serious? (PS, you know he’s serious about culture because his screenname is “artlove” (snort). GIVE ME A BREAK, douches of OK Cupid!

“call me a jerk” is like starting a sentence with “no offense, but…” when you’re about to say something suuper offensive.

I feel like that’s a UK English thing, at least in my experience—the only time I was ever told, “you look tanned!” was when I lived over there.

“60-year *reign*” #corrections