2. Wear what you love.
Don’t forget a snack or seven.
4. Or wear a jaunty hat.
6. Ensure you’re prepped to face the world.
With this DIY garter belt.
7. Eat breakfast without getting cheese dust on your fingers.
If you don’t think that Cheetos are part of a nutritious and delicious breakfast then we have nothing left to say to each other.
8. Scramble an egg inside of its own shell.
It’s magical. Watch the video here.
9. Defeat the monster that is the freezing cold toilet seat.
10. Take a relaxing bath with a book.
And use a retractable leash to make sure it never falls in again.
11. Remind yourself how perfect you are.
12. If you have a baby, make sure he or she is all clean.
13. And safely ensconced in the best fort of all time.
15. Or turn your computer into a Shaquintosh.
17. Sit however and wherever you want to sit.
19. Enlist the help of a higher power.
20. Use these words.
21. Make the most of your job.
22. Do a little redecorating.
24. Attach a car vent air freshener to your AC.
Your place will smell amazing (at least, as amazing as a car air freshener).
27. Velcro your remote controls.
You’ll never lose them again.
29. Or your kids.
30. Unwind by making a rainbow rose.
Get the directions here.
35. Replace your queen with the mother of all queens.
37. Fill your fridge with something you love.
38. Break your diet.
39. Make a quick and easy dinner.
Just press the hot water button without inserting any pods, and you’ll have the meal of your dorm-room dreams in seconds.
40. Or an ingenious one.
42. Draw chalk around the food that you don’t want ants to get in.
Like your pet’s food bowl.
43. Put some Kool-Aid in your beer.
45. Remember that Bill Clinton used to listen to Hole.
46. And that life is both sweet AND sour.
48. Give yourself a fucking hug.
You deserve it!