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Posted on Jan 26, 2015

George R.R. Martin Tried To Warn You About This Historic Blizzard But You Wouldn't Listen

An open letter to America.

by notrubharass

Community Contributor

These signs are obvious. But if you look between the words on the page, between the characters on screen, the message becomes crystal clear: when George R.R. sat down on his Windows 95 and started typing, he was trying to warn us about Superstorm Juno.

A quick google of "Game of Thrones" and "Juno" leads you to a "person" called Roland Juno-Di performing the theme song from the HBO show.

The signs were on YouTube this entire time.

Really, America, it's a shame it has come to me writing an freakin' open letter. You should have listened to me before. I've been explaining this theory on my Reddit page for four months now. No upvotes. No one believed me. Well now who's eating crow*?

America, you are SO stupid! George was practically taking a dump in front of you and spelling it out with his on feces, and you refused to notice. White walkers? I don't think I need to explain how that relates to Ferguson. That should be a given.

I know what some of you are thinking. Wait, so George R.R. Martin dedicated 20 years of his life writing five novels and created a wildly successful HBO show just to warn us about a blizzard in 2015?

Now you get it! Wow, America, you can really put two and two together. I'm surprised you're only 30th in rankings for Math proficiency. Truly I am.

Now that you're finally on board, what does this mean? Will we be safe? Did George leave us any clues? Thank you for asking, America. Indeed he did.

Over 50% of his character die, SUPERSTORM JUNO WILL LIKELY TAKE OUT OVER HALF OF THE POPULATION! Which totally sucks, but as long as Tyrion survives, I'm like whatever about it.