This Is A PSA To All Straight Men: Get Off Tinder

    You're embarrassing us.

    If you are a straight man on Tinder, you're being an idiot.

    Whether that is literally true or not doesn't matter because the intellectual capacity of an imbecile is the reputation of men who use Tinder.

    And the evidence in favor of that theory is embarrassingly overwhelming.

    To start, you're not funny...

    You have no chill...

    Like, at all...

    And you simply have no idea what women want in the least bit.

    They would rather burn to death in a plane crash than talk to you, much less go down on you.

    And your cheap attempts at flirting(?!) are getting shot down faster than you can swipe right.

    It's no wonder women are straight up playing men.

    They're doing it with quotes from You've Got Mail...

    Taylor Swift lyrics...

    Jane Austen quotes...

    Jaden Smith quotes...

    And pretending to be Carrie from Sex and the City.

    These are the things members of the opposite sex would rather do than talk to you on Tinder.

    And on top of all of that, THIS is how you choose to present yourself:

    I mean, honestly, is this really the image you want to put out to the world?

    Whether you're taking it seriously or not is irrelevant because you're making men everywhere look bad.

    And the ugly truth is that no one is giving you the benefit of the doubt, so stop doing stupid shit, you dumbass.

    If you're a straight man on Tinder, the odds are stacked against you in a game you are inevitably going to lose.

    So get off Tinder because you're not only embarrassing yourself, but you're embarrassing men everywhere.