The Miley Cyrus Twelve Days Of Christmas

If your true love gave you all this, A) I apologize on behalf of humanity and B) you might want to reconsider your life choices.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Twelve hair nubs bobbing...

Mauceri / MacFarlane / INFphoto.com

Eleven crazy "Smilers..."

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Ten tongues a-swinging…

Jamie McCarthy / Getty Images for MTV

Nine tortured teddies...

Sony Music Entertainment / Via youtube.com

Eight awful outfits…

Jason Kempin / Getty Images for Clear Channel

Seven sad sledgehammers...

Sony Music Entertainment / Via youtube.com

Six rubber undies...

Kevin Mazur / WireImage for MTV

Five naked wrecking balllllllsssssssssss..........

Sony Music Entertainment / Via youtube.com

Four funky faces...

Getty Images for Clear Channel, Getty Images, Allegri / Reuters

Three trailing tears...

Sony Music Entertainment / Via youtube.com

Two tiny leotards...

John Shearer/Invision / AP

AND...

MTV

One Miley Cyrus twerking.