23 Words Teenagers Love To Use And What A Thirtysomething Thinks They Mean

These kids today, man.

You’ve probably seen the post, 23 Words Teenagers Love To Use And What They Really Mean, which broke down the words the cool kids use today.

MTV

As a 38-year-old man, I was more than a little lost when I scanned the list, which worried me a bit.

Fox

What happened to “Rad”? Awesome”? “Audi 5000”? Now THOSE were slangs words!

In order to prove that I’m still “with it,” I decided to attempt defining these words without reading the definitions. After all, a cool guy like me can’t be too off, right?

1. “Turn Up”


My definition: The cool way kids now say “turnip.”
Used in a sentence: “You know my favorite veggie is a turn up!”

2. “TBT”


My definiton: The “in” way to refer to TCBY yogurt. Apparently even four letters are too much for these damn teenagers.
Used in a sentence: “Let’s get our froyo on at TBT!!!!”

3. “Grind”


My definition: What teens do to each other on the dance floor.
Used in a sentence: “Tammy and Bert were totally getting their grind on to that TLC song!”

4. “Chirped”


My definition: The rocking new way to tell your friends you adopted a canary.
Used in a sentence: “I just went to the pet store and totally got chirped, y’all!”

5. “Doe”


My definition: A really fine girl.
Used in a sentence: “Damn, Brenda Walsh on 90210 is a doe!”

6. “Mupload that ish”


My definition: Uploading an old episode of The Muppet Babies onto your iPad.
Used in a sentence: “Remember that Muppet Babies episode where they pretended to be astronauts? I need to Mupload that ish!”

7. “Swerve”


My definition: What inexperienced driving teenagers do in the car.
Used in a sentence: “I totally almost crashed when I was changing the CD in my car, but then I got my swerve on!”

8. “Swag Money”


My definition: Money used to buy stuff that was originally given away for free at awards shows.
Used in a sentence: “I bought this hat from Vanilla Ice on eBay with swag money!”

9. “Am I right, ladies?”


My definition: What you say when you try to answer a question in an all-girl study group.
Used in a sentence: “The square root of 121 is 11. Am I right, ladies?”

10. “I can’t even.”


My definition: When you’re surprised someone less cool than you pulled something off.
Used in a sentence: “Whoa, I can’t even get that Betty to return my page.”

11. “Can I get an amen!”


My definition: What kids obsessed with Sister Act say to their fellow “Sister Act-icts.”
Used in a sentence: “Blockbuster just got Sister Act 2 in! Can I get an amen!”

12. “Flannel Friday”


My definition: What you say when there are a bunch of grunge fans around.
Used in a sentence: “It must be Flannel Friday up in here what with all these Cobain wannabees.”

13. “Kk”


My definition: How kids abbreviate the KKK. Apparently even three letters are too much now for these damn teenagers.
Used in a sentence: “It is so awful what the Kk did in the South.”

14. “Is that a thing?”


My definition: The cool question to ask in 20 questions.
Used in a sentence: “Is that a thing? It is? OK, is it bigger than a bread box?”

15. “YAAASSSSSSS”


My definition: When you won’t answer your mom’s question, so she twists your ear.
Used in a sentence: “YAAAASSSSS, Mom, I did my homework!!!!”

16. “Hashtag”


My definition: A stoner who is constantly on Twitter.
Used in a sentence: “It’s 420 and that hashtag won’t even look up from his phone.”

17. “Killin’ It”


My definition: How you tell someone you’re taking care of a big bug.
Used in a sentence: “Keep your Doc Martens on, I’m killin’ it!”

18. “Sprang Break”


My definition: What a kid with a lisp calls spring break.
Used in a sentence: “Ith Isth sprang break!”

19. “Dat”


My definition: The cool way to reference the android on The Next Generation.
Used in a sentence: “Picard’s got nothing on Dat!”

20. “Mad”


My definition: The cool way to reference MadTV.
Used in a sentence: “Mad last night was the funniest thing I ever taped off the TV!”

21. “Fam”


My definition: An acronym girls use for a hot guy: fabulous, awesome, man!
Used in a sentence: “Oooooh, did you see that Fam walk by in his Jurassic Park T-shirt?”

22. “Turnt”


My definition: What the even cooler kids call a turnip.
Used in a sentence: “Did you hear that loser call his turnt a turn up? Bwahaha.”

23. “Fetch”


My definition: When you’re stuck taking care of the family dog.
Used in a sentence: “I can’t see the Spin Doctors concert with you this weekend, bro, I’m doing the fetch.”

Nailed it.

NBC

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