1. Nothing gives you joy like using your hold or mute button.
Because you have to vent to your co-workers briefly about the unruly “person” on the other end of the line.
2. You make this face when someone threatens to “take their business elsewhere.”
Oh, OK. One person will bring this corporation down. (._.)
3. You feel utter joy when you get on the line and a call doesn’t come through.
It’s an indescribable feeling to not hear that beep/dial tone in your ear.
4. You spend 70% of you day wondering how the hell you ended up with such a horrible job.
In fact, you’ve probably cried in the bathroom at work multiple times.
5. You spend the other 30% of you day wishing the phone system would go down.
Even if only for a few minutes. Enough time to get your sanity back.
6. Speaking of system issues, it SUCKS to have to tell a customer that the company is “upgrading software.”
Let’s be honest. Your system is janky and you need a complete overhaul. #factsonly
7. You become enraged when a customer complains about the long hold time.
YOU MUST BE A DETECTIVE! ASTUTE OBSERVATION, SIR/MA’AM. WHO DIDN’T KNOW THE HOLD TIME WAS LONG!?
8. You’re always surprised when someone tells you how long they’ve worked in the call center. Ten years?!
How have you been able to endure this hell for so long?
9. You sometimes lose your voice because you’re talking non-stop.
But hey, that’s an excuse to not come to work.
10. You’re too satisfied when you “accidentally” hang up on a customer.
Because 90% of the people you speak to on a daily basis are idiots.
11. You want to SCREAM when a call comes in minutes before your shift ends.
What the actual fuck?! Try again tomorrow, customer.
12. You loathe when a customer tries to initiate small talk, mainly because it’s awkward.
I really just want to answer your question and get you off my phone.
13. You want to let out an uproarious laugh when a customer asks for a supervisor.
Hate to break it to you, but you’re not talking to a supervisor. You’re also not going to get that refund you think you deserve.
14. You experience pure ecstasy whenever you have time off the phone.
Because every second away from the phones makes your day infinitely better.
15. This has become a common occurrence.
16. You’ve developed an aversion to speaking on the phone, even when you’re not at work.
Friends don’t understand it, but you’re literally on the phone ALL DAMN DAY. Text it.
17. This is how you feel whenever you get your monitor sheet:
This alone is probably one of the worst things about working in a call center. Big brother is watching, and he’s very particular about your tone.
18. You have trouble sounding sincere on the phone whenever a customer complains.
You’re not really sorry.
19. You make this face because you talk to no less than 50 people who don’t understand what a HIPAA violation is.
I know you’re the spouse, but I still can’t talk to you without an authorization. Good day!