yeah this is awful, I’m really sorry that people of color have to put up with stuff like this in their everyday lives. to any white folks who don’t get it (we’ll probably never fully get it), you might not see the big deal behind making *one* ignorant or insensitive (well-intentioned) comment, but when you have to deal with tons of them every single day from all different directions, on top of being marginalized on a larger structural level, every microaggression is like one more brick added to an ever-increasing pile on your body and soul. even if you can’t understand why certain things you say bother POC, if you’re in a relationship with someone and they tell you you make them feel uncomfortable, without exception the onus is on you to listen closely, look at yourself critically and be accommodating and receptive of their feelings. anyone can ultimately be in the wrong about anything, but this is still always the bare minimum that you should be contributing to any relationship and if you’re not willing to do that, you don’t deserve to be in one.
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