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The Secret To Selling Mascara Is Apparently Man Bulges

At least according to this weird commercial starring Vinny from the Jersey Shore??? NSFWish… Because bulges.

1. So this commercial for Benefit Cosmetics starts out with this hunky guy getting out of the ocean…

OK, so far so good.

2. And then there’s this guy who gets out of a pool wearing a giant chain and he winks at you.

(Actually Simon Rex, aka “Dirty Nasty,” aka still not getting where mascara comes in, but OK.)

3. And then suddenly there’s Vinny from the Jersey Shore doing yoga???

4. Then a hunky guy just walking through a parking lot…

Still no mascara??

5. And this woman reacts like this to him.

6. AND THEN SHE JUST STARES AT HIS PENIS?

7. And then it cuts to Vinny’s junk??!?

8. And then this guy’s junk???

9. And then this junk???

10. And then Vinny starts grabbing himself???

11. And then everybody else does??!?!

13. AND THEN VINNY PULLS OUT A TUBE OF MASCARA?

14. AND THEN THE GIRL JUST GRABS THIS HUNK’S DICK.

15. And then she does this.

16. And then Vinny just winks.

17. And I guess that’s how you sell mascara??

18. Here’s the entire bulgy experience.

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