1. Because of Blockbuster:
2. Because you weren't finished with that beer:
3. For burgers and weed:
4. Because you are actually in the afterlife:
5. For Mcnuggets:
6. For that erectile problem:
7. Because your mom is using the car right now:
8. For a husband:
9. Because your sandwich order was not fulfilled:
10. Because of an angry cat:
11. Because of lame-o neighbors:
12. Because you're getting swindled:
13. Because grandma needs her beer:
14. Because there's a full moon out:
15. Because you can't sleep next to that noise:
16. To get those damn hooligans off the street:
17. Because the waffles were raw:
18. For sex:
19. Because math homework is hard:
20. Because you wanted a WESTERN burger:
21. Because you didn't ask for that marinara crap:
22. To get the time:
23. To let everyone know the truth about Kelly Ripa:
24. Because the bus stop is just too far:
25. Because you've forgotten how to cook a turkey:
26. Because of those damn broken zippers:
27. SPIDERS.
28. And for love.
