1. First of all, make sure you buy fireworks with incredibly manly and potent names, like ATOMIC WARLORD.
4. Try to avoid that thing where all the fireworks go off at the same time.
6. Same goes for your buttocks.
7. If you must hand out sparklers, ensure you entrust them only to mature adults.
8. All things considered, it’s probably best not to light your fireworks in the bath.
9. Embedding them in a pile of cow dung is probably not a tremendous idea either.
10. Oh, and remember to leave a long wick, so you have plenty of time to clear the area.
13. If possible, take a small child to witness its first firework display. His/her response will gladden your heart.