Used to mean: The place you go back to every couple of months.
Now means: Where you inexplicably find yourself living again.
Used to mean: The thing you agreed to in order to get lots of money!
Now means: The thing you agreed to in order to get lots of debt.
3. “Going out”
Used to mean: Something you can do easily, at any time.
Now means: Something that suddenly is really, really tricky to organise.
Used to mean: What you avoid doing until you have literally nothing left to wear. And sometimes not even then.
Now means: What seems to be getting done quite regularly by your parents instead.
Used to mean: The massive group of people you always seem to be surrounded by.
Now means: People you now only have digital contact with.
Used to mean: Where you live.
Now means: Where you’ll never have to go again.
Used to mean: Probably something to avoid.
Now means: Probably what you’ll actually have to do.
Used to mean: What you expect to get immediately as soon as you graduate.
Now means: Something you get only after a really long, protracted process.
Used to mean: What you’ll get in your first job.
Now means: Impossibly, what you’ll need to get your first job.
10. “Dream job”
Used to mean: What you are completely committed to pursuing.
Now means: What you might come back to in a few years.
Used to mean: A one-on-one conversation with someone looking to hire you.
Now means: A bizarre process involving a large group of people that will almost inevitably end up with you not getting hired.
Used to mean: Getting 2-for-1 on cans of Red Stripe.
Now means: Getting someone to actually ask you to work for them.
13. “Waking up”
Used to mean: 11am. Maybe.
Now means: 8am. Definitely.
14. “Hard work”
Used to mean: 40 hours a week.
Now means: 80 hours a week.
Used to mean: What you occasionally see if you have a very early lecture.
Now means: A period when you actually do a lot of your work. Because you are at your job.
Used to mean: When your loan comes in.
Now means: When your actual pay comes in. From your job. That you EARNED.
Used to mean: Crippling restriction on fun.
Now means: Less crippling restriction on fun.
Used to mean: The same as any other day. Because you don’t do much.
Now means: When everyone else is off as well and you can plan things!