1. Instead of being jealous of your best friend’s new shoes, you’re insanely jealous of her new Dyson vacuum cleaner.
2. You’re obsessed with LearnVest. Only 22 more months until you pay off your credit card debt!
For those of you who don’t know, LearnVest is a wondrous money management tool for ladies.
4. You’re obsessed with owning a house and spend your spare time looking at real estate porn.
5. You understand that it’s just a dick move to show up empty-handed to a party. BFFs, colleagues, new acquaintances — they all get a goddamned bottle of wine.
7. You are sooOOOOoooOOOOO not into being called a Millennial anymore.
8. When you go to Sephora, you spend wayyyy too much of your time and paycheck in the skincare section.
9. On your list of Topics I Frequently Bitch About: Your insane dry cleaning bills.
Because you’re keeping your work wardrobe fresh and clean.
12. Your wedding daydreams aren’t so much fun anymore…now that you’ve realized that wedding=$$$$=debt?!
13. You’ve become more aggressive about asking for promotions at work.
14. You actually make an effort to keep your place clean. Or, if you’re really fancy, you even have a cleaning lady. Dayummm.
15. Your experience shopping at Urban Outfitters has totally changed. You used to come here, like, once a week.
16. The pride you take in knowing that you haven’t asked your parents for money in years: priceless.
17. You no longer use Facebook to overshare — you use it to make you seem smart and cultured.
- Rallies for climate change action are taking place around the world ahead of the United Nations climate talks in Paris. ›
- Planned Parenthood officials said they believed Friday's shooting at a Colorado Springs clinic was motivated by opposition to abortion. ›
- And watch a man react to the modern world after spending 44 years in prison. ›