1. The beach doesn’t want anyone to outshine it.
WHO’S CUTE NOW? Still me. The beach.
2. Or for anyone to get too romantic near it.
“SINGLE4LIFE SO U R 2.” - Beach
3. It definitely doesn’t like people who pose for bikini glam shots.
5. Worst of all, wedding pictures. Nope. GTFO.
I can’t love so you can’t either. Mwahaha.
6. And if people don’t learn their lesson from others, the beach will keep teaching it.
Some people never learn.
7. The beach isn’t gonna stand for anyone’s early morning yoga.
GO BACK TO BED.
9. And anyone who tries to parasail off the beach may be punished.
You get what you deserve.
10. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like being surfed on.
You just USE me for my WAVES.
11. Or witnessing people relaxing in the salty breeze.
REMINDER: I’m in charge always and forever.
13. It will ruin your family pictures.
TAKE YOUR HAPPY FAMILY SOMEWHERE ELSE.
14. And your glamour shots.
Oh sorry, is getting hit with a wave not the look you were going for? My bad! Lol!
15. And when you try to build an amazing sand castle, the beach won’t have any of that shit.
In life there are winners and losers, and I’m here to remind you that you’re the loser.