Here's what you need:
• Several cans of the cheapest beer (because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost).
• An inability to dance or sing.
• A recycling bin, for your empty pawns and soldiers.
HOW TO PLAY:
1. To start: Everyone shotguns a beer. The first person to finish and chuck their can in the recycling bin is the SCHMIDT-MEISTER.
2. Whenever Nick Miller makes a face: Everyone yells, "IT'S NICK MILLER TIME" and takes a sip.
3. Whenever any character is in the bathroom: The floor becomes hot lava. Last person with their feet on the floor takes a drink.
4. Whenever Winston puts someone in their place: Sing, "I think I'll trrryyyy defying graaavity!"
5. Whenever anyone breaks out in dance: Do three fist pumps, take a drink.
6. Whenever Nick Miller puts himself down: Yell, "BOOOO!"
7. Jess makes a pathetic insult: Drink three times.
8. When Nick and Jess are romantically awkward: Cuddle the person next to you.
9. When Jess sings while talking, everyone must sing the next thing they say. Anyone messes up: EVERYONE TAKES A DRINK.
10. Anybody reminisces about something in the past: Take two drinks.
11. If any character starts getting drunk and weird: Take a drink to catch up.
12. When any of the guys is excited about a stupid idea: Drink until it seems like a good one.
13. When the stupid idea goes horribly wrong: Waterfall, starting with the Schmidt-Meister.
14. Any reference to fat Schmidt: The Schmidt-Meister finishes his drink, everyone else sings "We Built This Schmidty."
