The Internet Reacts Hilariously To Gwyneth Paltrow And Chris Martin Splitting Up

“Conscious uncoupling”. Say what?!

1. We’re all still recovering from the fact Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have “consciously uncoupled” (split up).

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2. But it’s OK, because the internet’s reactions have cheered us up no end. From marking Chris’ escape from strict dieting.

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6. To commenting on Coldplay’s inevitable new music.

So Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow are splitting up. Very sad. Do you think this will make Coldplay worse or worse?

— Ticketline (@Ticketline)
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So Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow have separated.. Coldplay's next album will be unbelievable! #ChannelThatPainChris

— Daniel OConnor (@Dan_Hai)
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8. Some pointed out how Chris’ music may have affected Gwyneth.

I guess Gwyneth Paltrow finally got around to listening to Coldplay...

— Katie Grainger (@Smauglocked78)
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You know that period after a breakup where all you do is sit in the dark & listen to Coldplay albums? It sucks for Gwyneth Paltrow.

— NΛNΛ (@hellonaa)
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10. Some (including Ronan Farrow) made valid points in this sad, sad hour.

Gwyneth Paltrow still knows more about flax oil than you.

— Ronan Farrow (@RonanFarrow)
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But who do Bey and Jay side with in all this?

— Connor Simpson (@connorsimpson)
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Is it wrong to find it funny that Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow have just seperated and they have a child called Moses?

— Darryl Drummond (@chr1spbacon)
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Remember when Brad Pitt and Gwyneth Paltrow had the same Sliding Doors hair? That was cool.

— Katie Khan (@katie_khan)
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14. Others were more optimistic and looked straight to the future.

Could every man on Earth named McIntosh try to marry the newly single Gwyneth Paltrow so that that kid's new name will be Apple McIntosh.

— Colin Mc Ardle (@colinblackrock)
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I reckon the odds on me and Gwyneth Paltrow finally getting hammered on Sambucca shots this year just rocketed.

— Caitlin Moran (@caitlinmoran)
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16. But most people were mainly interested in the term “conscious uncoupling”.

Conscious Uncoupling would be great band name.

— Hannah Allan (@ohitshannah)
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gwyneth paltrow and chris martin having a 'conscious uncoupling' is the whitest breakup of all time

— Josh Fjelstad (@joshfjelstad)
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At first I thought Conscious Uncoupling was going to be the name announcement for their third child.

— Rachel Harrison (@rachfacelogic)
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Just tried to unconsciously couple with the missus. Having none of it.

— Jamie East (@mrjamieeast)
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Question for enemy of the English language Gwyneth Paltrow: If two people fall in love at first sight, do they "unconsciously couple"?

— Kevin O'Sullivan (@TVKev)
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21. Even bananas were used to demonstrate the new terminology.

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22. But others just couldn’t hide their dismay. RIP Chris and Gwyneth.

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Kimberley Dadds is the UK celebrity editor for BuzzFeed and is based in London.
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