1. Your dreams won't come true because your skin isn't radiating.
2. You will be required to wear white pants and do bizarre acrobatics EXACTLY when you're on your period.
3. The only known way to charm desi chicks is a brand new banyan.
4. Hussain or Vishal will break into your house demanding to check if your toilet is as shiny as Yami Gautam's face.
5. You could lose your senses at any moment if someone wearing a specific deo walks by you.
6. Drinking bottled mineral water will make you speak the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
7. Every time you have a toothache, reporters can magically appear demanding to know if your toothpaste has salt in it.
8. Not using special sensitive toothpaste will have you experience dreadful jhanjhanahat.
9. Pimples are a much higher priority than studying for your exams.
10. Sleeping on the the floor will make you orgasm.
11. Bathing will make you orgasm.
12. Washing your hair will make you orgasm.
13. Drinking cold beverages will make you orgasm.
14. Chocolate will make you orgasm.
15. Bottomline: If Katrina endorses it, it will make you orgasm.
16. You will be publicly shamed if you're wearing a white garment that isn't emitting light.
17. And if you're a woman, you will have to singlehandedly keep everything sparklingly clean, from dishes to clothes to floors to toilets.
18. You'll also be singlehandedly responsible for making sure your kid is winning every quiz, race, and popularity contest in school by using a myriad of irrelevant products.
19. And if they are denied chocolate of their choice, they will leave their homes.
20. Food at popular fast food restaurants will send you on the path to being a stoner.
21. Some chocolates will have the same effect.
