1.
The Walmart employee who left this in their stead.
3.
The person who made this sign and thinks sales are a stupid idea.
4.
This person who got their shorts halfway up then said, "Fuck it."
5.
Whoever gave Evan this present.
6.
This person's professor.
8.
The artist behind this "painting."
9.
The person who can't decide which is sadder: their computer trash can's name or the fact that it's empty.
10.
This mom who just wants the holidays to be over with.
12.
The person who decided that they'll get in shape next year.
13.
Cleverbot, who was finally broken down.
14.
The writer of this fortune cookie.
15.
This person's overwhelmed sister.
16.
The classy person who gave up on this math test.
17.
The translator behind this sign.
18.
This guy, who has joined the ranks of the purse-holders that have come before him.