1. Minnesota Vikings
Super Bowls played: 1970, 1974, 1975, 1977
Poor Vikings, always a bridesmaid, y’know? The last few years haven’t been too kind them, with injuries and quarterback issues plaguing the team. Even Adrian “Purple Jesus” Peterson can’t seem to save this team, and he can do this.
2. Buffalo Bills
Super Bowls played: 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994
Four years in a row they went to the dance only to leave empty-handed, much like every dance I went to in high school.
3. Cincinnati Bengals
Super Bowls played: 1982, 1989
They are one of the few teams on this list that feel poised to make a run in the next few years. Let’s just hope this doesn’t happen again.
4. Philadelphia Eagles
Super Bowls played: 1981, 2005
Being the only NFC East team not to win a Super Bowl must drive them crazy. No wonder Philly fans are so surly.
5. San Diego Chargers
Super Bowl played 1995
They lost 49-26 against the 49ers. I guess they should have charged their batteries longer! No, but seriously, they got whooped. But will these paper-champs ever win a Super Bowl? Who knows? With Philip Rivers getting older (but looking sharp) their chances are dwindling, even with Norv Turner out of the picture.
6. Atlanta Falcons
Super Bowl played: 1999
They lost to the Broncos and John Elway, a veteran QB with something to prove (could he win a second consecutive ring? The answer was yes). This sounds a lot like the current Broncos (with veteran QB Peyton Manning who has something to prove), so if the Falcons do make it to the Super Bowl this year, they better hope the orange and blue isn’t lined up across from them.
7. Tennessee Titans
Super Bowl played: 2000
They lost to Kurt “Bag Boy” Warner and the “Greatest Show on Turf” St. Louis Rams, and don’t seem on pace to return to the big game any time soon.
8. Carolina Panthers
Super Bowl played: 2004
Sports Illustrated’s Peter King called this the ““Greatest Super Bowl of all time.” I’m sure the Panthers beg to differ, though, since they didn’t win. But with current QB Cam Newton racking up fantasy football points, maybe their luck will change, right? Yeah, probably not.
9. Seattle Seahawks
Super Bowl played: 2006
The Pittsburgh Steelers held Seattle’s Shaun Alexander (and league MVP) to 95 yards in this game, which was just the beginning of Alexander’s Madden Curse. Let’s hope Russell Wilson and Marshawn Lynch pass on the video game cover if offered, because this current squad is on the right track to reach the top again.
10. Arizona Cardinals
Super Bowl played: 2009
Eek. I watched this at my friend’s house surrounded by Cardinals fans (my friend included). I have never seen the air sucked out of a room faster than when Santonio Holmes caught that touchdown with 35 seconds left. Unfortunately, the QB carousel has reared it’s ugly head in Arizona over the past few years, making a return visit to the Super Bowl very unlikely.
And now, the “Never-beens”:
11. Cleveland Browns
Some people believe all that is needed is a franchise QB for Cleveland to become a contender. Some people also believe in Santa Claus.
12. Detroit Lions
It’s weird to remember that this is the same team that went winless in 2008. However, they now are in possession of arguably the best wide receiver in the NFL (Calvin Johnson) and have a real chance of making a run soon. Too bad they play in the same division as the Green Bay Packers and Chicago Bears, though.
13. Houston Texans
As far as expansion teams go, it shouldn’t be a shock that the Texans haven’t been to a Super Bowl. Although playing in a Peyton Manning-less AFC South makes their prospects brighter, the emergence of Andrew Luck in Indianapolis is definitely going to make winning their division that much harder in the coming years.
14. Jacksonville Jaguars
The Jags are awful but their cheerleaders aren’t, so here is a picture of them instead.
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