1.
When it feels like it takes forever for the card machine to go through.
2.
When you get a missed call from work on your night off.
3.
When you pretend to not notice the money placed on the bar because the customer thinks they're too good to put it in your hand.
4.
When a regular keeps trying to make conversation with you on a busy night.
5.
When your friends all talk about how much fun they have on their evenings and weekends.
6.
"Cheer up, it's the weekend."
7.
When the customer repeats the price back to you in a shrill and incredulous tone.
8.
When you walk into the bar on a busy night.
9.
Perfecting the sarcastic "if I wasn't at work I would headbutt you" smile.
10.
When some dickhead colleague leaves the ice scoop in the tray so you get frostbite next time it's your turn to collect the ice.
11.
When people change their order after you've made their drinks and act like you're the bellend.
12.
When you're serving somebody and a different customer shouts what they want at you.
13.
When there's a domestic happening at the bar and you just want to give them their change.
14.
When you go to the toilet just so you can sit down for five minutes in the middle of a shift.
15.
When a group of ten students walk in and order each drink individually.
16.
When someone orders a fucking pimms and lemonade.
17.
When someone has decided to throw up next to the toilet.
18.
When you're trying to collect glasses but people won't get out of your way.
19.
When customers start acting like they're your best friend
20.
When the boss gives you a pep talk before a bank holiday Sunday/ New Year's Eve/ Pay Day Friday
21.
Walking into the toilets after a Saturday night.
22.
When you get a second to check yourself out in the middle of a busy shift.
23.
When someone asks you to recommend one of the guest ales.
24.
When a weird customer is telling you a long, drawn out, involved story you have to listen to.
25.
"When was the last time you had a weekend off?"
26.
"Oh, and a guinness."
