1. Select your brunch spot.
Does it have good food? - Meh.
A charming atmosphere? - Meh.
Does it actively encourage binge drinking at breakfast with “all-you-can drink” specials? …
2. Say “I love boozy brunch!” Then slap yourself in the face for using the term “boozy brunch.”
4. Slam the nearest mimosa you can see. If that means taking it off a server’s tray or another table, do what you have to do.
5. Ask yourself, what’s a thing I should drink large quantities of? Oh of course— tomato juice!
A pitcher of bloody Maries please!
6. Look at the home fries—are they still in focus? If so, slam another bellini.
7. Take a moment to tell your fellow brunchers how much you love them.
10. If your server says they don’t have glasses that big, provide your own.
Or ask for a large bowl.