When I was 22, my friends and I were in this super cheesy club in Saint Louis which wasn’t well known for its overall cleanliness. I excused myself just past midnight to use the restroom. Before I started my hover-squat, I placed my phone on the back of the toilet. Afterward, when I went to grab for my phone (and wasn’t too stead in a dress and heels after a night of celebrating another year gone) I slipped in “something wet” and came crashing down, head butting the toilet and breaking my nose. The impact made my vision fuzzy, but I can remember several screams though out the bathroom. To make matters worse, the matronly bathroom attendant wouldn’t let me leave until the bleeding stopped and to make matters worse, my friends assumed I went home with someone else and left me there! Stranded on the landing with a broken schnozz!