16 Demoralising Stages Of A British Summer

Spoiler: It is usually too hot or too cold.

1. That one weird hot week in May.

During which you dress so inappropriately for the temperature, it should be named Sweaty Week. Look out for a lot of untanned legs on display. If you’re under 22, you will be doing exams.

2. And then it gets cold again, and two months of excessively mild weather follows.

FOX / Via

3. Then in late July there is a heatwave!

4. For a few days you get into the swing of it. You can have Pimm’s!

Pimm’s is nearly as refreshing as beer!

5. And then you run out of work-appropriate hot-weather clothing.

I have worn the longish shorts, and the floaty flowery dress, and the linen trousers. Now what?

6. And the news is all “GUYS, IT IS HOT OUTSIDE!”

Flo Perry

7. And you’re like “I KNOW, I HAVEN’T SLEPT PROPERLY IN 10 DAYS!”

Spyglass Entertainment / Via

Miss you pyjamas.

8. You decide you hate summer and that it’s very unpractical.

Come back mild weather, all is forgiven.

9. Embarrassing sunburn is everywhere.

Flo Perry

Remember, the best sun protection is staying inside.

10. A hosepipe ban is the final straw. / Flo Perry

11. Then suddenly, as you’re looking sadly at your wilting geraniums, RAIN STORM.

12. And the news is all “DO YOU KNOW IT’S RAINING?!”

Flo Perry

13. Then the dramatic interesting rain is over, and another month of mild begins.

But we BBQ regardless.

14. Retailers take advantage of the seasonal purchases.

15. Just as you are beginning to pack away that one work-appropriate hot-weather outfit for another year, BAM, one weird hot week in September.

Fingers crossed!

16. Then suddenly it’s October and you can wear a coat again, like you will for the next seven months.

Bye summer! See you next year!

Missing you already. <3

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Flo Perry is a staff writer for BuzzFeed and is based in London.
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