16 Waitrose Essential Items That Are Not Remotely Essential

    Poppy and sesame seed thins are a basic human right, really.

    1. How does one get through the day without some vermicelli nests?

    2. Green lasagne sheets, for when beige just doesn't cut it.

    3. Some dirt just won't budge without some sea salt and kelp.

    4. Literally, need a tongue sandwich right now.

    5. Everyone has a right to artichoke hearts.

    6. Couldn't live with out a cheeky cappuccino mousse now and then.

    7. Essential lardons, when one can't simply chop up bacon.

    8. Poppy and sesame seed thins, a basic human right, really.

    9. Tear-and-share bread is absolutely essential to maintain the Waitrose living standard.

    10. Cardamom and black pepper soap, for when kelp and sea salt just won't do.

    11. Baby avocados, for when you couldn't handle any regular-sized avocados.

    12. Reduced fat pâté, for when you desperately need some pâté, but are trying to shed a few pounds.

    13. Limoncello dessert, so in times of need you'll have a dinner-party-acceptable dessert.

    14. No self-respecting Waitrose shopper on a budget should have to put up with bog-standard ratatouille.

    15. Fresh penne, for when you desperately need the bite that dried can't give.

    16. Life without profiteroles is not a life worth living.

    Never change Waitrose, never change.

    Chav's getting free coffee @waitrose what ever next a free bar with @StellaArtois perhaps #dailyfail