1. They will patiently wait for exactly the right time.
5. They will perform their role in a regular and timely fashion without getting too invested in it.
6. They refuse to accept even your best excuses for staying in bed.
7. They are willing to take great risks in order to get the job done.
8. If you ask nicely, they may even wake you up with a massage.
9. Unless you need a more vigorous wake-up-call, in which case they are happy to oblige.
10. They are fundamentally and morally opposed to the “snooze” button.
- Chicago officials have released the video of a white police officer fatally shooting Laquan McDonald, a black teenager. The officer was charged with murder Tuesday. ›
- At least 19 people in seven U.S. states have been infected with E. coli in an outbreak officials believe is linked to rotisserie chicken salads sold at Costco. ›
- Adele broke the single-week U.S. album sales record set by NSYNC in 2000. "25" sold at least 2.43 million in about three days. ›