1. “Going out” in Los Angeles usually means hanging at a friend’s house for dinner…or meeting up at your favorite neighborhood joint.
You know what you like, and you like to stay close to home because driving=ugh.
2. Meanwhile, over in New York City, your social calendar tends to revolve around trying out cool new spots.
And you feel like you have to have at been there at least ONCE just so you can say, “Yeah, I tried it, and it was overrated.”
3. Weekends in Los Angeles: hiking in Griffith Park followed by a protein smoothie.
4. Weekends in New York: picnicking in Central Park (or McCarren, Prospect, etc.).
5. If the weather’s bad in L.A.: movie at the Arclight.
6. In New York: You add some layers, and carry on as usual.
7. Tricky footwear in Los Angeles: You drive in flip-flops, change into heels when you park — meaning you can wear heels anytime/anywhere.
But you can totally get away with weirder footwear here.
8. Tricky footwear in NYC: If there’s walking involved, heels might be the bane of your existence.
At the very least, in winter, you’re commuting in boots and switching them out at work.
9. Commuting in L.A.: You want to upgrade your Honda Civic but can’t afford to.
10. In New York: You cringe every time the price of the MetroCard goes up.
11. If you’re an assistant in L.A., you never make enough money to live off of.
12. If you’re an assistant in New York, you never make enough money to live off of.
13. But…in Los Angeles, you might be living in your own apartment by your late twenties because studios/one-bedrooms can be fairly affordable.
14. In New York, living alone is an expensive privilege. So, congrats on your fairly decent wages.
15. By the time you’re in your late twenties in L.A., you’ll find most of your friends are in serious relationships. (Or even you are! Hooray!)
17. In Los Angeles, there’s a good chance you’ll stay in an apartment for a couple years.
What are seasons, even?
19. Missed Connections in La La Land: Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s.
20. Missed Connections in NYC: usually on the subway.
21. Getting drunk in Los Angeles: Well, bars close at 2 a.m., so it’s rare that you’re partying until the crack of dawn.
22. Getting drunk in New York: How about capping off the night with some morning pancakes?
23. Things you tweet about in L.A.: traffic!
24. Things you tweet about in New York: goddamned subway.
25. Brunch in L.A.: totally happens, but isn’t a given on the weekend…especially if it’s a long drive.
27. “Hipster” (or whatever, you know) twentysomethings in L.A.: Silver Lake or Echo Park.
28. “Hipster” (or whatever, you know) twentysomethings in NYC: Brooklyn or die.
29. Your post-work routine in L.A.: You take a run, then go home and catch up on all the TV you’ve been missing.
31. People you’ll date in L.A.: Wannabe actors, screenwriters, directors, agents, Scientologists, and the occasional normal person.
32. People you’ll date in NYC: Finance people, bloggers, publishing assistants, graphic designers, wannabe novelists, tech startup folks, bike messengers.
33. If you’re an aspiring writer in Hollywood, your goal is likely to be staffed on a TV show or to sell your screenplay.
34. Young, aspiring writers in New York? More like The New Yorker, or selling their first novel.
35. Hobbies in L.A.: Start a podcast, a web series, or join an improv team.
36. Hobbies in NYC: Brew your own beer, or start a rooftop garden.
37. In Los Angeles, distance can be a real dealbreaker.
Venice to Echo Park is basically like living in two different cities!
38. In New York, someone living across town is a pain, but a bit more navigable.
39. In Los Angeles, you spend your money on fitness classes and lavish trips to Whole Foods.
40. In New York, you spend your money on drinks, food, and cabs.
41. In L.A., it’s easy to overdress because this is totally fine to wear out:
42. In NYC, everyone looks like they just got out of work.
45. See? It’s really just apples and oranges. Not that you’d know anything about that, New York…
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