1.
"Is it possible?! Am I actually...HOME ALONE?!"
2.
"Well, first thing's first. I need to liberate myself from this pants prison."
3.
"I shouldn't dirty more silverware when I can just use my armforks."
4.
"Who needs drinking glasses when you have a mouth?"
5.
"The acoOoOoOoustics are soOoOoOo goOoOoOod in this hoOoOoOose."
6.
"I caught that thing falling off the counter and no one was around to see how cool I looked."
7.
"Why am I so good at dancing when no one's home?"
8.
"Bathroom doors? HA! Never heard of 'em!"
9.
"What was that noise? Of course we're getting robbed on the ONE NIGHT I'm home alone."
10.
"What if I choke on food and no one's around to give me the Heimlich?"
11.
"No ghosts better fuck with me tonight."
12.
"I'm definitely not taking a shower. Everyone knows what happens when you take a shower when you're home alone."
13.
"Maybe I'll start wearing my hair like THIS."
14.
* Farts with bravado * "Ha...nice."
15.
"I don't care what anybody says, this show is fucking entertaining. But I'm not going to admit that to anyone."
16.
"I hope no one comes home and catches me eating ice cream in my underwear on the kitchen counter."
17.
"Maybe I should tidy up the house...tomorrow."
18.
"I'm actually pretty bored."
19.
"Wait, no I'm not. I can do anything I want. I'M HOME ALONEEE!"
