1. When you're a shark that runs from its problems instead of facing them head-on.
2. When you're medicine that doesn't take its job seriously.
3. When you're a cow who's been hitting the sauce a little too hard lately.
4. When you're a bus who needs to grow the hell up and stop living in a fantasy world.
5. When you're Jesus and you have some serious unchecked aggression.
6. When you're a lamp post that doesn't even try anymore.
7. When you're spell check and you're severely under-qualified for your job.
8. When you're this lady and you went 80 years never pouring juice until this moment.
9. When you're Ralph, and you're either a real wise guy or exactly the opposite.
10. When you're this rainbow, whose self-esteem never recovered from high school.
11. When you're the letter "W" and you think the English language revolves around you.
12. When you're Tom, who has a way of pushing people over the edge.
13. When you're autocorrect and you never grew out of your "class clown" stage.
14. When you're a boxer and your worst enemy is yourself.
Allow yourself to succeed!
15. When you're a bed living in the past.
16. When you're a mug that should have listened to your mother's advice more often.
17. When you're a dog who partied too hard in college.
18. When you're a sign who doesn't take responsibility for its own actions.
19. When you're a washing machine who showed up drunk to work twice this month.
20. When you're a goat who feels like the only time you get people's attention is when you're humiliating yourself.
No one will respect you until your respect yourself!
21. And Martha.
