Davine S.
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    • Davine S.

      About 10-12 years ago, Sky News did a piece about where all our recycled waste ends up. It showed how we (in the West) throw things into the recycling which then get shipped away on huge carrier ships to countries like Bangladesh for sorting. The workers - including children - in those facilities have to sift through our crap; there are so many carcinogens in the air, and they’re not given proper safety equipment. Besides which, the cost (in carbon footprint and money) of transporting the waste negates the point of recycling. The reporter picked up an envelope and said “I just found a bill here… it’s addressed to a Mr. Joseph Blackman of 216, Main Street, Fulham”. (I made that name and address up, but they didn’t - they showed it to the camera.) They were attempting to show how far the pile of waste had travelled, but it was completely unnecessary to *out* this guy who was just doing his civic duty by recycling his waste. It was like they were blaming that specific person for the horrible conditions of the place, as if he even knew about it. Many of us do our best to be respsonsible citizens of the world - it’s not necessarily within our control where the recycling ends up, and we shouldn’t be doxxed for at least trying. I sent them an email calling them out about it at the time, and I got a “sorry if you were offended” non-apology. I hate that their broadcasts are so quick to violate the privacy of individual citizens - it’s tacky, to put it extremely mildly. It seems like all TV “journalism” is going this route, now; if they’re not quoting random people on twitter as “sources”, they’re making extremely unethical decisions live on air, just to fill airtime.

    • Davine S.

      I’m in a long-distance relationship: 5,000 miles apart, 8-hour time difference, disconnected work / sleep schedules, and never enough money or vacation days. It’s a LOT to deal with, but it’s also the happiest, healthiest, most fulfilling relationship I’ve ever had. I’ve done an LDR before and swore I never would again, but it turns out it just wasn’t with the right person. We’ve managed so spend time together 3 times over the last 11 months, and we know that this relationship is *it* for us. Regarding this list of questions, I think it’s much harder to deal with ambivalence or disinterest. A couple of my family members don’t think to ask about my boyfriend very often, so I have to be the one to mention him, and I end up sounding like a teenager with a crush. I find that really hard to deal with; this is a guy I’m very serious about and am planning a life with, so while I can’t be with him, I’d love the chance to talk about him sometimes. Plus, on the days when it’s exceptionally painful to be apart, it’s important to be able to rely on family & friends to get you through - being taken seriously as a couple is a huge comfort on those days. TL;DR: I’m less annoyed by questions like this and more grateful when people show an interest in my happiness. No.14 and No.21 are tough questions, though. I haven’t seen him in 5 months and have no current plans/opportunities to see him, so those are painful topics. :(

    • Davine S.

      I did the same exact thing, VAd. I was so happy for her and amazed by her courage, and I felt like she would definitely beat the cancer and take on the world. Then the in memoriam card came up and it was like being sucker-punched… I burst into tears instantly. God, I have tears in my eyes now just thinking about it.  It’s such an important message to get regular PAP smears and check-ups, and never, ever ignore an instinct you might have about your body. It can be daunting to go and get checked for things because you’re afraid of hearing the worst - I’ve had a false-positive result for abnormal cells before, which was pretty nerve-wracking - but it’s a million times better than delaying treatment so that you can stay in denial.  As far as I remember, Margo was pretty quick with all of her doctor’s visits when she first started noticing problems, which is all the more reason why it’s essential to act fast. It’s our best chance at a full recovery.

    • Davine S.

      The first image is photoshopped. I made this comparison image the last time I saw this on Buzzfeed, which was a couple of years ago; the real photos are on the bottom.  They do look like they could be father and daughter, but the photoshop job puts Emma’s lips and eyes on Richard’s face (as well as smoothing out most of his wrinkles) while cloning his naso-labial folds on her face. Don’t take everything you see on the internet at face value.

    • Davine S.

      ME TOO. I ended up reading her entire blog that night, from the diagnosis to the wedding to the end of her life, and I absolutely bawled. The most gut-wrenching part was how much she and her husband had been looking forward to having their own children, and she was realising that would be impossible - it seemed more upsetting to her than some of the really terrible parts of the cancer and treatments. I ached for her. Then I told my mum about it the next day and burst into tears all over again. :(  (http://bamitgirl.wordpress.com/2013/02/05/not-a-goodbye/)

    • Davine S.

      You can’t have this list without the bride herself saying “I want to look like a princess / I don’t want to look like a princess” and “I feel like a bride in this dress / It’s a beautiful dress, but I don’t feel like a bride in it”.  The consultant saying the following tired lines with almost no deviation: “Hiiiii, you must be [bride’s name], congratulations!”, “So, tell me about your fiance”, “How would you like to look on your wedding day?”, “Is this your first time trying on dresses?” and “Is there a price-point we’d like to stay around or under?” There are frequently brides who think they want multiple dresses. There’s almost always at least one really heart-wrenching story per episode. There’s often a bride who has lost a lot of weight and is struggling with her new body image (I really like those episodes because it’s usually less about the $$$$ and more about self-acceptance). I hate when they let Pnina come over when the bride is consulting her guests - that would be so intimidating and would really make you feel pressured into pretending you loved her stupid tacky dresses. Full disclosure: I am addicted to this show, and I’ve been re-watching on Netflix even though I’ve seen most of them before. (I’m never going to have a flashy wedding, so it doesn’t hurt to live vicariously.) It’s interesting to Google the featured brides to see if they ended up wearing the dress they picked on the show - they often have blogs, and I’ve seen quite a few talking about how warped the editing is (not that this would come as a surprise to the savvy viewer, but it’s kind of a bummer to think of their special moments being spun like that.) Most of them say that the staff at Kleinfelds are really nice and invested in the brides, it’s just the TLC production teams that make the experience unpleasant. This list would’ve been a lot more fun with more representative gifs, though. Endless lists get to be really dull after about 10 items.

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