Promoted

29 Reminders That The Illuminati Is Ready To Take Over Any Second

WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD, SHEEPLE.

1. LET’S START SIMPLE. IGGY AZALEA? ILLUMINATI. JUST LOOK AT THAT EYE:

2. YOU THINK ICE CREAM SANDWICHES ARE SAFE? SWEET, DELICIOUS ICED CREAM? THINK AGAIN:

3. PYTHAGORAS IS GREEK FOR “ILLUMINATI”:

4. I BET YOU’RE SITTING THERE LOOKING AT THIS THINKING SOMETHING LIKE “I BET DUCKS ARE SAFE. DUCKS HAVE TO BE SAFE.” WELL, THINK AGAIN, YA KNUCKLEHEAD:

5. AS IF YOU NEEDED TO BE TOLD SOCKS WITH SANDALS WAS ILLUMINATI:

6. HAM STACKED ON A PYRAMID SHAPE? WELL, WELL, WELL. WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE, HAM?

7. BINDER TRAGEDIES? THAT’S THE ILLUMS:

8. KANYE? KANYE?!?!?!?! KAN-YE?!?!?!?!!?!!?!??!?!??!?!??!?!?!?

9. OBAMA? ILLUMINATI. ARE YOU EVEN SURPRISED?

10. STILL NOT CONVINCED? LET’S GO DEEPER:

11. ELEMENT NUMBER 13, ALUMINUM? YOU BET YOUR REAR END THAT’S ALUMINATY:

12. OLIVE GARDEN BREADSTICKS? WHEN YOU’RE HERE, YOU’RE ILLUMINATI:

13. WEIRD AL? MORE LIKE “WEIRD ALL Y’ALL HAVEN’T NOTICED HE’S ILLUMINATI YET”:

14. STILL NOT CONVINCED? LOOK AT THIS SECRET MESSAGE INSCRIBED ON THE US 25 CENT COIN:

15. THE FAULT IN OUR STARS? YEAH, I’LL TELL YOU WHAT THE FAULT IS. THEY ARE ILLUMINATI:

16. YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY CHANNEL PROGRAMS? ILLUMINATI:

Disney

17. HOW COULD HAVE JOHNNY BRAVO HAVE PREDICTED WINDOWS? I’LL TELL YOU HOW: ILLUMINATI:

18. THE POWERS OF THE MODERN WORLD? ALL ILLUMINATI. JUST LOOK AT THIS DETAILED INFO-GRAPHIC:

19. MORE LIKE “CORN ON THE NEW WORLD ORDER”:

20. WHAT ABOUT BEYONCE? COME ON, YOU ALREADY KNOW THIS ANSWER. JUST LOOK CLOSELY:

21. PAINFULLY CUTE ANIMALS? DON’T TRUST ‘EM:

22. THAT ANNOYING THING THAT HAPPENS TO YOUR SHEET EVERY DAMN NIGHT? YOU ARE SLEEPING ON A BED OF ILLUMINATI:

23. WILLOW PAPE? YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. ILLUMINATI:

24. PEARS ARE LITERALLY IN THE TOP 10 MOST ILLUMINATI THINGS ON THIS GREEN EARTH. TRUST ME:

25. THE SAUCE THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR PIZZA ROLLS EVERY. DAMN. TIME? GIVE THANKS TO THE ‘NATI FOR THAT:

26. NOTHING? THAT’S ILLUMINATI:

27. THAT THING THAT HAPPENS TO YOUR CHARGER RIGHT BEFORE IT GOES? THAT’S ILLUMINATI:

28. ICE CUBES ARRANGED CONVENIENTLY IN THE BOTTOM OF A GLASS OF IDENTIFIED LIQUID? WOW. ISN’T IT CLEAR?

29. WAKE UP SHEEPLE. QUESTION EVERYTHING:

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