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10 Vintage Ads That Were Not F#©king Around

Today’s ads are husks by comparison.

1. “Ambient” ad for Atabrine, an anti-malaria drug. Photo shot in Papua, New Guinea during WWII.

2. 1902 Japanese cigarette ad. Just try to look away from the flying, smiling, smoking Pegasus with dragon wings.

3. 1970s Norwegian ad for Brigg beer. “Our brew!” Damn fucking straight, it’s our brew.

4. Early 20th century Colgate ad. If it tamed dragon breath, that’s good enough for me.

5. 1980 Smirnoff ad. Just a woman waterskiing drunk, while holding a martini, behind the Loch Ness Monster. And the model in the ad, Caroline Cossey, waa born a man.

6. 1919 French ad for Jubol laxative. LOOK at those Jubol shit scrubbers cleaning your colon—barefooted! How courteous of them!

7. Early 20th century Dr. Pepper ad. The 3 Vs copy, brilliant. Plus, way to steal Budweiser’s thunder with the tagline. PLUS, look at the fucking magnificent lion.

8. Late 19th century ad. Do you understand what BALLS it took to say “dispense with a horse” in the late 19th century?

9. Late 19th century Tetley ad. Brilliant line.

10. Sean Connery, who just turned 83 on Sunday, could probably still kick the shit out of any other James Bond, excepting maybe Daniel Craig. MAYBE.

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