10 Cereal Box Mascots Who Would Make Great Politicians

In the wake of the government shut-down, our divided nation is in desperate need of non-partisan leaders who can clean up the political mess in Washington… and still be part of a balanced breakfast. posted on

1. Tony the Tiger

His controversial views on abortion may alienate some voters, but his ideas to tackle campaign finance reform? They’re grrrrrreat!

2. Cap’n Crunch

America loves a war hero in office, although the Cap’n has yet to overcome the left-wing conspiracy theory that his military record was falsified (apparently, a real captain wears four stripes on his uniform).

3. Count Chocula

His nobility background may alienate middle class voters, but he’s guaranteed to bring in the historically disenfranchised vampire vote.

4. The Cheerios Honey Bee

He finished first in his class at Georgetown Law!

5. Fred Flintstone

He has the star power to be the next Ronald Reagan or Arnold Schwarzenegger … so long as he stays sober. And Wilma as his first lady? Yabba dabba doo!

6. Toucan Sam

He certainly has a nose for politics, although he may have lost some votes over his unfortunate remarks at the G8 Summit.

7. Lucky the Leprechaun

Insiders say he’s a lock with young voters… assuming he finally produces a birth certificate.

8. Snap, Crackle, and/or Pop

The Crackle-care website wouldn’t crash nearly as often as healthcare.gov.

9. The Trix Rabbit

His economic stimulus package could revitalize the economy… assuming voters can move past his racy twitter photos.

10. Sonny the Cuckoo Bird

Still has promise, but someone should have told him the cardinal rule of politics: never get caught in bed with a live man or a dead woman.

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