The 19 Most Unrealistic Expectations Of Beauty

An open letter to the fashion/toy/mannequin industry.

1. We DEFINITELY can’t all wear one sock, no pants, have one long arm, and no head:

3. We can’t all have a stick with two pegs instead of legs to keep our dresses on:


4. We can’t all have smooth, pore-less skin (or scary, horror arms):

5. We can’t all have tiny heads and giant bodies:

6. We can’t all have eyes placed in random, upsetting spots on our faces, Mattel:


7. We can’t all have awesome, bronze eagle heads:


(No matter how much we wish we did.)

8. We can’t all have actual animal heads either:


9. We can’t all have long, nightmarish bodies, F-150 owners:

10. Not all men can be just a head and legs:

11. Or women:

12. We can’t all be 3-foot goblin monsters:

13. We can’t all have giant mouths, pendulous breasts, and what appears to be half a vagina:

14. We can’t all be the leader of the free world:

15. We can’t all literally be a hand giving a peace sign with legs:

16. We can’t all have perfectly rounded cones instead of heads:

17. We can’t all be armless, headless, transparent, and packed with baby parts:

18. We can’t all hang upside-down in floral-print dresses:

19. And we can’t all walk around like the weight of the world rests on our shoulders:

Actually, most of us can and do. Disregard.

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