6. Because the bathroom could be really far away and there’s a perfectly usable toilet right here.
7. Because opening umbrellas requires too much effort.
9. Because baking is hard and you’re just going to have another birthday next year.
10. Because Band-Aids are expensive, and 911 is there for a reason.
14. Because Best Buy has a perfectly usable Xbox and air conditioning.
16. Because delicately excavating something takes way too long.
17. Because that college degree isn’t making it any easier to find a job.
19. Because your name is so easy to vandalize.
21. Because the trash can is way down at the other end of the street.
24. Because your driveway is really, really long.
- Turkey's military released an audio recording of what it says were warnings to the Russian warplane before it was downed near Syria's border. ›
- Protesters marched in Chicago for the second night in a row after the release of a video showing the police shooting of black teen Laquan McDonald. ›
- And President Obama actually made his daughters laugh at the annual White House turkey pardon. ›